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Vinaigrette for Boiled Spring Vegetables

March 23, 2012 By admin Filed Under: Recipes

I’m thrilled to share this gift of spring, a recipe philosophy by Tamar Adler, author of the recently released An Everlasting Meal: Cooking with Economy and Grace (Scribner, October 2011). Simply put, Tamar is one of the most beautiful and inspiring people that I have ever met; her love of olive oil, herbs and life is contagious, and her kitchen prose, so eloquently expressed during a Ger-nis Culinary class, mesmerized me. Tamar, her book, and more, will win you over too at tamareadler.com. To new inspiration! Best, Destin

There’s no better time to learn from your own cooking than spring.

Spring vegetables–like little radishes and turnips and potatoes and lettuces–don’t need much done to them other than to be simply boiled or eaten raw, maybe with a mustardy vinaigrette alongside or mixed through.

How little cooking you need to do to spring ingredients gives you a perfect opportunity to pay close attention to each small act of cooking you do: each time you slice a fresh, barely acidic spring radish from its muddy leaves you can take the time to notice where it makes the most sense to separate the plucky little root. When you touch its cut side to salt, you can take note of how much salt a raw radish needs in order to taste perfectly seasoned.

After you’ve paid enough attention to your small vegetable trimming and salting, use the quiet simplicity of spring ingredients to get really good at making vinaigrette. Once you are, it becomes second nature, and throughout the rest of this season, and the next, making a vinaigrette is often the only cooking, other than cutting and salting, there is to do.

A young spring or summer boiled or raw vegetable tossed with vinaigrette is a taste of the season itself. Here is a recipe for a big batch of mustard vinaigrette with instructions on how to pay attention so that you can learn how to make vinaigrette as you go, instead of learning how to follow a recipe for one.

Vinaigrette for boiled spring vegetables
• 1-2 cloves of garlic
• somewhere in the neighborhood of a ¾ tablespoon salt
• around 1/4 red onion or a shallot, finely diced
• about 1-1 1/2 tablespoons red wine vinegar
• about tablespoons Dijon mustard
• 4-5 tablespoons olive oil

Slice an onion or shallot in half through its root, then dice it. The easiest way to do this is to lay a half cut side down, slice it, parallel to the cutting board, a few times almost all the way to the root, then make a hatched pattern, again leaving the root intact, directly down toward the board, and then carefully cutting off the resulting tiny pieces. If the pieces seem big, make a pile of them and chop them until they’re suitably small. Put the onion or shallot in a small bowl.

Peel the clove of garlic, then pound it to a paste with a little salt in a mortar and pestle or on your cutting board. I recommend starting with one clove of garlic, and then deciding next time you make it or the one after, whether you want to try it with two. Add it to the onion or shallot.

Add the red wine vinegar to your garlic and onion. Use a measuring spoon, but notice what a tablespoon juice ends looks like once you’ve tipped the spoon into the bowl. Also notice how much of it’s taken up by the volume of onion or shallot.

Do the same with the salt. Use a measuring spoon, but then pour that into the palm of your hand. Anyone who’s ridden a bike knows that muscle memory’s good—it may take more than one batch of vinaigrette for you to learn to salt by touch, but you’ll be much closer than you were before.

Let those ingredients sit together for a few minutes, then add the mustard, mixing it through well. Taste this. It’s the most important moment to taste a vinaigrette: even this concoction of vinegar, mustard, raw onion, and garlic should taste “good,” but strong, assertive, vaguely salty. Taste it with your finger. It’s helpful if you notice whether it’s thick or thin, watery, viscous.

Add the olive oil in the same way. Measure it, then notice how much it is in relationship to the other ingredients. Whisk it in, or just mix it well with a spoon. It doesn’t have to all be uniform. Once it’s all mixed together, taste it on its own, then drag a vegetable leave through it, and taste it that.

If this seems like a lot of attention to pay to one dressing, remind yourself that what you’re doing is taking and giving a class at the same, and also that you’re getting good at the only really important skill to have during hot months.

Destin Joy Layne is program director of Sustainable Table at GRACE Communications Foundation where she works to create positive social change throughout our food system. The program is also home to EatWellGuide.org, a national free online directory and mapping tool for finding fresh, locally grown food, and TheMeatrix.com, the critically acclaimed award-winning film and the most successful web advocacy campaign in history.

Destin coauthored the publication Cultivating the Web: High Tech Tools for the Sustainable Food Movement and has been featured on Jus Punjabi television yoga.

Visit SustainableTable.org, Facebook.com/SustainableTable, and Twitter.com/eatsustainable to learn more about the issues of sustainable agriculture, eating organic, buying locally, and the hazards of industrialized food.

Something for Everyone

March 23, 2012 By admin Filed Under: Park Slope Eater

As the city awakens from its Winter sleep, it’s time to renew our appreciation of everything it has to offer. For this issue, here’s a look at classic foodie establishments including a gourmet food shop, an up-and-coming food truck, and a happening vegetarian restaurant.

A Haven for Cheese Enthusiasts

Right now, on Valley Shepherd farm in New Jersey, a lamb is being born nearly every fifteen minutes. This is just another layer to the hectic environment as milking season begins, when the sheep are milked twice a day from now through the summer. Their milk will be taken to the cheese room to be treated before being packed into a mold and transferred to the cave that’s modeled after the traditional aging atmosphere perfected by European cheese mongers. One hundred feet deep with twelve-inch thick concrete floors, walls, and ceilings, the cave nurtures Valley Shepherd’s cow, sheep, and goat cheeses for months as they ripen. Their cheeses have been farmers’ markets favorites for years, and after the success of their hole-in-the-wall shop in SoHo, Brooklynites finally have steady access to their goods in the Park Slope outpost at 211 7th Avenue.

The small, welcoming shop is a crash course in foodie favorites, packed with local products like Sour Puss Pickles and Brooklyn Raaka chocolate, freshly baked breads, Ronnybrook milk, and of course Valley Shepherd’s cheeses, pastas, and lamb sausages. The cheese case is visually stunning, but to the fromage novice the gourmet offerings may be intimidating. For those looking to experiment, start off with a sampling across the board of a cow, sheep, and goat cheese. A unique cow’s milk favorite is the Perlitta, which has been aged for two years and has a sharp bite with a bit of crunch to the texture. The Tartufo Shepherd, a sheep’s cheese with pecorino and black Tuscan truffles, is one of the best in the shop. As for a prime goat cheese, try the wonderfully named Gottogetagoat, which is similar to a gouda. If you’re looking for a softer cheese, the Scentsation has a delicious full-bodied flavor from its wash rind treatment and spruce bark wrap throughout the aging process. It’s slightly pungent, but not stinky.

Springtime is a great season to check out Valley Shepherd’s offerings, since the cheese will be at its freshest and seasonal offerings like ricotta and lamb cuts will be on hand. A wine and cheese party is the perfect way to celebrate the warming weather, and the shop has everything one needs to complete the soireé. Or, take it to go with a sandwich for a picnic in the park. At the time of this writing, the five choices included one with brie, granny smith apple, arugula, balsamic, and olive oil, and ham with mustard, arugula, pear and their Melter Skelter cheese that’s similar to Swiss. I’ve only just grazed the surface of what’s in store on 7th Avenue, since there’s a new discovery to be made with each glance at the stocked shelves. Don’t miss out on the fresh buttermilk, Poorfarm maple syrup, local honeys, fill-your-own olive oil, or pretzel croissants, but come explore on your own to see what you can find.

My Dog Ate My Barbecue

Perhaps you’ve seen Ashley and Matt Weavil around Brooklyn before. Restaurant veterans of over ten years, Ashley currently waitresses at Buttermilk Channel and Matt works at the Farm on Adderly. Inspired by both restaurants’ community feel and commitment to local, seasonal products, the couple decided to start out on their own with a food truck called The Fat Beagle. Drawing from Matt’s culinary upbringing in North Carolina, their focus is Southern barbecue with a creative twist. They have been bringing it to life since last Fall with pop-up events throughout Brooklyn. Their debut at No. 7 in Fort Greene treated guests to classics like pulled pork and brisket sandwiches, and small bites like sweet potato fries, fried pickles, and cornbread with honey butter and sorghum. An unexpected favorite was their vinegar fried chicken sandwich with bacon and jalepeno. In December, the Fat Beagle arrived at Sycamore for lunch in the Weavils’ neighborhood of Ditmas Park. The star of the show was Q in a Cup; layers of baked beans, coleslaw, pork, and cornbread served in a mason jar.

As they prep for the truck’s arrival, expect more pop-up events around the borough. They’ll be testing recipes to whittle down the menu, which will rotate throughout the year to support a seasonal and local philosophy. Their hope is to work with bars looking for food trucks in their backyards as a primary location, but look out for them on the streets by mid-2012. Check out their website, thefatbeagle.com, for updates as their journey develops.

Mob Mentality Takes Over Downtown Brooklyn

Obscure history buffs will know what Maimonide of Brooklyn (MoB) is all about before even glancing at the menu. Maimonide, the ancient philosopher and doctor, was one of the first to figure out that there was a connection between eating fruits and vegetables and good health. It should come as no surprise, then, that MoB is a vegetarian restaurant near Atlantic Terminal at 525 Atlantic Avenue. It is the venture of hotelier, Cyril Aouizerate, who is the co-creator of Mama Shelter in Paris, and is a surprisingly seamless blend of Brooklyn and Parisian culture. One part trendy eatery, one part family-friendly dining, and one part hipster hotspot, MoB combines the best of both worlds between cheap eats and fine dining. The restaurant itself has a cozy neighborhood feel to it with an unpretentious atmosphere (complete with a comic book detailing their story and celebrating the Brooklyn and vegetarian lifestyle) and the prices to match, but the quality of the food and impeccable service make you feel as if you’re treating yourself to a high-end meal.

Take a seat at one of the large wooden communal tables or in the outdoor garden and browse the unique menu centered around their MOBs, a dish similar to a deep-dish pizza slice or an open-face sandwich. A piece of dough shaped like the arches of the Brooklyn Bridge is piled with fresh fruits and vegetables, which is served in a special serving tray cast in Paris that’s imprinted with all of Brooklyn’s neighborhoods. Most MOBs are a grouping of ingredients meant to help a particular ailment, like the Brainiac with sautéed sour apple, baby beets, sunchokes, and walnut wasabi oil, or the Glowing Skin with kalamata olive and sunflower seed tapenade, grilled zucchini, avocado, tomato, and orange. Other highlights are the Rock MOB with a creamy white bean, fennel seed, and almond milk base topped with escarole, pear, and basil, or their sweet MOBs, like the Energizer with raisin and date marmalade, honey roasted pear, toasted almonds, and coconut whipped cream. All of their offerings have a skillful balance of textures, and salty and sweet ingredients.

While the MOBs are the stars of Maimonide, the rest of the menu is not to be ignored. Their starters include a creamy corn soup with popcorn, oven baked mushroom and chick pea nuggets with honey mustard, and two versions of their vegetarian saucisson. Both their fruit saucisson of fig, date, hazelnut, and pistachio and their fennel and sage saucisson of sundried tomato, porcini mushroom, and sunflower seed with aioli are hung, dried, and sliced like traditional sausage. For dessert, don’t miss their vegan carrot cake with chestnut cinnamon frosting. Keep a look out as the year goes on for events taking place at MoB as well. As the venue develops, it’s sure to be a vegetarian staple in the heart of Brooklyn.

Beyond Arts and Crafts

March 23, 2012 By admin Filed Under: Friends & Neighbors

Spring is almost here, which means summer is just around the corner and registration for Park Slope’s many summer camps is in full swing. Aside from the usual fare, Park Slope also offers some very special and creative camp experiences with focuses on sword fighting, writing, filmmaking, singing, acting, and more.

For the Young Director (Ages 6-11)

“I consider myself a creative person and I work with creative people, but no one’s as creative as the seven-year-old students in my action film class,” says Tim Sutton, whose camp and after-school program Video Kid reflects the needs of the YouTube age. “Kids are so creative. They can make worlds out of nothing. And video is not a foreign environment to them.” Through collective projects incorporating production design, animation, improvisation, directing, acting, and effects, kids make films worthy of the festival circuit.

While the campers are treated to film screenings, Tim and his team of teachers also like to keep the focus on creation. “One of the things that is very important to me is that media is something to engage in the how-to sense, not necessarily just to glaze over and watch,” he says. “When students learn how to do what they see, it makes it seem more engaging than when they’re just watching it.”

Video Kid began as an after-school program at PS 321 last year then grew exponentially to other schools throughout the year including PS 10, 39, 107 and The Children’s School. Its great success has led to the special summer camp that runs for three weeks in July. Students can focus on everything from adaptation to comedy to special effects year-round, or they can explore filmmaking from all aspects in the Video Kid 101 class. “These students,” Tim notes, “come out of here knowing what a close-up is, they know what a mid shot is, they know what a high angle is, they know what stop-animation is, they know what an actor is. And the ideas they come up with and the energy they put toward it – adults don’t have that.”

For the Uncommon Gal (Ages 6-11)

Some girls prefer to work on their art without having to deal with boys, and Curious Jane offers an ever-changing assortment of themed week camps that foster education in art, science, building, and design in an environment where girls can learn, experiment, and create. “Women are open with sharing resources, so it’s been a very supportive, ‘let’s figure this out together’ environment,” says founder Samantha Razook Murphy, who employs a range of teachers and artists to navigate the campers’ journey through themes like zine publishing, toy design, DIY fashion, story arts, and wired technology.

The all-female aspect is new to Samantha, but as a mother of two daughters, she enjoys giving girls a gender-friendly learning environment. “With girls there tends to be an internal and external pressure to get the right answer, while boys have more of a freedom to try something and if it doesn’t work, it explodes, it falls apart, then we’re going to try again,” Samantha says. “Girls often move at a more hesitant pace at first than boys, so it’s great for them to have the freedom to experiment. All of our classes are very project-based, so we’re trying to emphasize to the girls that this is about them, they can play around. Plus our all-female staff is great – they all have experience and comfort in what they teach, and the girls can look at them and see a role model.”

Since its inception in 2009, Curious Jane has branched out to multiple New York City locations as well as Boston, Philadelphia, New Orleans, and Naples, Florida. In addition to daily games and theme-focused activities, Curious Jane students also take occasional field trips, like to the Brooklyn Kitchen, Brooklyn Children’s Museum, or even to give trapeze a try or visit a real woman-owned woodworking studio. But for the most part, Curious Jane’s true home is Park Slope, which Samantha says has been very supportive: “People want to be involved. It strikes a chord.” Curious Jane’s fourth annual summer program starts in July with classes at The Berkeley Carroll School, The Brooklyn Free School, and International School of Brooklyn.

For the Blossoming Actor (Ages 4.5-14)

If your child has a flair for the theatrical, White Bird Productions’ Creative Theatrics offers a summer workshop for kindergarten to sixth grade students. Celebrating its 13th year in operation, Creative Theatrics gives campers real theater and stage design training from its staff of teaching artists and professional actors like camp director Lorrie Harrison, who has been with the non-profit founded by Kathryn Dickinson for the last eight years. “There’s always more to learn and explore,” Lorrie says, “and the right place to be is when you’re almost falling off the log, but not quite. You always need to be at that point of discovery.”

A typical day at Creative Theatrics includes a mix of acting, music, and art design split up by lunch, snacks, outdoor time, and group activities. Students from kindergarten to second grade meet at the Prospect Park Picnic House on Prospect Park West and 3rd Street, and older students meet at the Old First Reformed Church on 7th Avenue and Carroll Street, which serves as the shared stage for all Creative Theatrics campers for their end-of-the-week performances. “We have a show to put on every Friday at 2:00,” Lorrie says. “There’s something about that that’s energizing.”

While Creative Theatrics campers get to learn acting genres, dance choreography, and costume, prop, and puppet design, Lorrie wants them to leave the program with three things: “First, I want them to have a great time because it’s summer. Second, I want them to feel good that they can make and perform a play in a week. Thirdly, kids are always asked to make meaning out of difficult subjects in school and in life — like Shakespeare, parts of history, math, science, and anything they’re faced with in school, and we want kids to face these challenges in a fun and creative way, and then to feel the empowerment of saying ‘I know Shakespeare! So what if I’m in first grade?’”

For the Greek God Bookworm (Ages 6-13)

For fans of the popular Rick Riordan children’s book series Percy Jackson & the Olympians, Brownstone Books’ Camp Half-Blood gives kids ages 6-10 a chance to experience a real training ground for young demigods just like in the books. After hearing about the camp’s success in Texas, Park Slope mother Crystal Bobb-Semple decided to bring the magic to the neighborhood for her children in 2010. “Most of all so much of what makes Brooklyn special converges in Park Slope,” Crystal says, which is why the park was the ideal location for the demigods-in-training.
Camp Half-Blood takes advantage of Prospect Park’s combination of both open space and narrow pathways for a range of Greek god-inspired activities like phalanx training, sword-fighting battles, and even chariot battles updated to the modern day via rickshaws. Campers team up in the name of Athena, Hermes, Apollo, and others and engage in storytelling, role-play, and even daily quests and prophecies under the guidance of their counselors AKA The Golden Fleece. In addition to the physical challenge of learning archery, sword fighting, and Greek war formations, campers also get a lesson in art by decorating swords, flags, and creating their own Pandora’s box and labrynth.

As for the camp’s growing success, Crystal credits her campers: “Children are such truth seekers,” she says. “They know that the world can be unfair, that good people sometimes misbehave, and that results can be arbitrary. Greek mythology does such a masterful job of explaining history, morality, and consequence without being preachy. The frailties of the Gods and heroes in Greek mythology allow kids – all of us, really – the freedom to be both flawed and fantastic.” Sounds a lot like Park Slope itself, a place where it’s safe for kids to plunge into projects with like-minded thinkers and aim high, make fearless mistakes, and try again like true warriors.

Learn more about these camps here:

Video Kid
videokidbrooklyn.com

Curious Jane
curiousjanecamp.com

Creative Theatrics
whitebirdproductions.org

Camp Half-Blood
brownstonebooks.com

Summer Camp Roundup

March 23, 2012 By admin Filed Under: Feature

On February 4th, PS 321 hosted “School’s Out: Summer Camp and After School Expo”, and invited dozens of neighboring summer camps to showcase what their summer programs offer to local children. I was reminded of the excitement I felt as a child signing up for summer camp. At the surface, summer camps stand as the ideal means in which to entertain children while they are away from the classroom—yet in my youth I found the educational and social benefits of attending a summer camp far reaching.

The camps that participated in PS 321’s expo and many other programs in the city offer children the opportunity to explore their interests, hone in on their prospective talents, utilize their social skills, and flourish in a community where the pressures of academia are relieved. We’ve gathered some of the most stimulating programs below.

SPECIAL INTEREST

Two months away from homework and quizzes gives children the opportunity to immerse themselves in specialized or mini-camps, which speak to their blossoming interests.

Film and video enthusiasts can sign up for a hands-on creative video workshop with Video Kid Brooklyn Summer Camp (www.videokidbrooklyn.com). They offer the opportunity for children to learn storyboarding, editing, acting, cinematography, special effects and much more. Campers will have a go at Special FX classes with underwater cameras, adapting scenes from some of their favorite pre-existing films, and create short films to premiere at the 2nd Annual Video Kids Film Festival! Video Kid Brooklyn Summer Camp runs from July 9th through July 27th from 9am to 2pm at $395/week.

Nature-oriented and local, Kim’s Kids Summer Camp (www.kimskidscamp.com) is run right out of PS 321. Campers ages four and a half to 11 will investigate the wonders of nature in Brooklyn; they will take trips to the pool, go on hikes, visit museums and the Bronx Zoo, and partake in “playground hopping”. They will also walk the Brooklyn Bridge and learn about its construction and history. Kim’s Kids runs from July 2nd through August 10th from 9am to 3pm. Pricing varies based on how many days your child will attend (3 days for 3 weeks is $795).

ADHoops Training (www.adhoopstraining.com) runs basketball clinics in the summer for all of the future Knicks players in the city. At only $10 per session, these clinics emphasize the fundamentals of the game including ball handling, shooting, and lay-ups. ADHoops will hold five sessions in June at Bishop Ford High School in Park Slope for boys and girls in 1st grade through 8th grade. Clinics are offered on June 1st, 8th, 15th, 22nd, and 29th from 6pm to 7pm at only $10/session.

The Brooklyn Youth Music Project (ps58.org/community.cfm?subpage=1456872) offers a two-week Suzuki string workshop for musicians aged four through 18-years-old. Professionals will instruct young cellists, violinists, or violists, at their Carroll Garden space. While they fine-tune their string skills they will also learn the basics of music theory and the program comes to a head with a performance on July 13. Camp will run from July 2nd to July 13th from 9am to 3:45pm for $800.

Learn the ropes of summer camp, literally, at Brooklyn Boulders’ Summer Adventures (www.brooklynboulders.com) at Degraw St and 3rd Avenue. Campers will learn the basics of rock climbing– everything from top-lining, and bouldering, to slacklining! They will also play games and go to the park with their counselors. While they are still figuring out the dates that their Summer Adventures camp will run, one week of Brooklyn Boulders is $495 and camp hours run from 9am to 3:30pm.

The Textile Arts Center (www.textileartscenter.com) runs a day camp in the summer that exposes youngsters to creativity through textile media. At registration, campers can choose between two areas of focus: weaving and surface design. In the weaving class kids will learn how to create fabrics (through weaving, pattern reading, and using a 4-harness loom) to be made into products like bags and toys. Under the surface design focus, textile-savvy children will learn how to dye fabrics, stencil designs, and sew. Camp weeks run from June 25th through August 10th at $475/week.

ARTS-BASED

In a city as artistically inclined as ours, children are able to learn necessary skills to utilize in their crafts at specialized summer camps– have it be painting, violin, improvisational theater, or classical dance.
An arts-based day camp that encourages children to become explorers of the world, Brooklyn Kids (www.GoBrooklynKids.com) runs a program for seven to nine-year-olds during the summer in Park Slope. The ratio of staff to campers is one to five, so children will flourish in their areas of interests, which may include: stage works and theater in conjunction with the New Victory Theater, perfecting painting styles with in-depth studies of Degas and Van Gogh’s techniques, dance, soccer, and even healthy cooking. Campers will keep a journal and a treasure box to commemorate their experience at Brooklyn Kids. Brooklyn Kids from July 16th to August 3rd from 8:30am to 3:30pm at $350/week.

Spoke The Hub is renowned as one of Park Slope’s most exhilarating community art spaces in Brooklyn. With a new theme each week, children are invited to enroll in Spoke the Hub’s summer camp, Camp Gowanee (www.spokethehub.org/camps/camp-gowanee), a multi-art intensive camp that boasts professional artists as their instructors. They offer a dance camp, and activities pertaining to street art, fashion, and filmmaking. One of the nine themes this year is a tribute to Vaudeville—where campers will create and perform stand-up comedy routines! Camp Gowanee runs from July 9th through August 13th from 9:30am to 5pm at $435/week.

The Brooklyn Arts Exchange (bax.org/youth/school-breaks/summer-arts) at 5th Avenue and 8th Street holds a seven-week Summer Arts Program based on exploring the performing arts. Children grades K-6 may choose from tumbling, puppetry, circus arts, acting, and more. Each week there is a new creative theme; and during Baxapalooza week, children will pay homage to Woodstock: “BAX style”. Financial assistance is also offered. BAX runs from July 2nd through August 17th from 9am to 3pm at $375/week.

The Brooklyn Design Lab (www.brooklyndesignlab.org/summerk2.html) will hold six summer labs this year for campers to go deeper into the world of design. They will offer a printmaking studio, clay studio, wood studio, a bookmaking studio, 3D studio, and a collage studio. These week long labs will teach youngsters the basics of each craft; in the 3D studio, for example, campers will create sculptures form wood, clay, and fabric to understand space and balance. You may end up with a new piece of art for your kitchen at the end of the week! The Brooklyn Design Lab runs from July 16th through August 24th from 9am to 11am at $220/studio session or $1270 for all six labs.

SPORTS-CENTERED

For the child with a penchant for athletics, a sports-centered summer camp provides a healthy outlet for little-all stars to improve their skills while staying active.

Camp Olympia (www.campolympiany.com/camp) in Park Slope has a sport intensive summer camp for children ages four through 15. Their main activities include baseball, swimming, soccer and basketball—all of which are instructed by head coaches and professionals. Camp Olympia sets out to broaden campers’ sports background while learning advanced skills and techniques. Camp Olympia runs from July 2nd through August 17th from 9am to 4pm at $200/week.

Floyd Bennett Field is the perfect place to send your active child (ages three through 15) to summer camp. Aviator Sports Summer Camp (www.aviatorsports.com/content/summer-camps) allows campers access to the outstanding facilities on-site; some of which include an ice skating rink, basketball courts, a rock climbing wall, a gymnastics arena, and a swimming pool. They also host dance and theater focused camps for seven to 15-year-olds. Aviator Summer Camp will bus children in from every borough. Aviator Sports Camp runs from July 2nd through August 31st from 9am to 4pm at $550/week.

DAY CAMPS

Summer camps in the city are all encompassing in terms of activities and your youngster’s interests. Children are able to socialize with others on a daily basis while functioning in a group setting and exploring new ways to have fun.
Aside from putting safety as their number one priority, CBE Kids Camp (congregationbethelohim.org/cbe-kids/camps/) located on 8th and Garfield boasts a multi-cultural seven-week program for kids K-4th grade. The campers can participate in outdoor sports, nature walks, circus arts, and go for a swim at the camp’s on-site pool. CBE Kids also has a travel camp for 10 to 14-year-olds where tweens go on daily trips to locations like the beach, bowling alleys, the Bronx Zoo, Luna Park, and baseball games. They are also encouraged to go on overnight trips to Hershey Park and Club Getaway in Kent, Connecticut. CBE Kids runs from July 2nd through August 17th from 9am to 5pm at $420/week.

A private day camp with four locations (Park Slope, Windsor Terrace, Bay Ridge, and Carroll Gardens), the Park Slope Day Camp (www.parkslopedaycamp.com) presents children with a wide variety of activities to enlist in. It is an outdoors-based camp so expect campers to frolic in Prospect Park, go horseback riding, and visit a farm where they will pick their own fruits and vegetables. They have flexible and accommodating programs so that campers may stay for as short as 10 days or as long as eight weeks; and they also offer specialized mini-camps like Sonic Soccer and Cirque D’Ete (a circus camp). Park Slope Day Camp runs from July 2nd throug August 24th from 8am to 4pm. Pricing varies based on how many weeks your child will attend, 3 weeks is $1400.

The Brooklyn Cultural Adventures Program (www.heartofbrooklyn.org/bcap) is a great summer camp for your child to explore the heart of Brooklyn. Drop off is at the sculpture garden of the Brooklyn Museum and campers will venture between the Brooklyn Public Library, the Brooklyn Botanic Garden, Prospect Park Zoo and other cultural institutions in the area. This year’s theme is “Myths and Magic” so expect children to puzzle over ancient legends and learn about the beginnings of time through art and science! Camp runs from July 2nd through Augst 10th from 8am to 3:30pm at $650/session.

For more information on any of the above listed summer camps, please visit the camp’s web site.

Summer Camps of Note

Each of these camps offer unique opportunities for your kids. We suggest that you take a good look at the camp websites that intrigue you. Feel free to get in touch, they will all be happy to hear from you and glad to answer any questions you may have.

Amerikick
www.amerikick.comArt Lab Inc
www.artlab.info

Aviator
www.aviatorsports.com

The Bay Ridge Summer Sports & Theatre Camp
www.bayridgesportscamp.com

Beansprouts
www.beansproutsnurseryschool.com

Berkeley Carroll School
www.berkeleycarroll.org

Brooklyn Aikikai
www.brooklynaikikai.com

Brooklyn Arts Exchange
www.bax.org

Brooklyn Botanical Gardens
www.bbg.org

Brooklyn Boulders
www.brooklynboulders.com

Brooklyn Children’s Museum
www.brooklynkids.org

Brooklyn Craft Farm
www.brooklyncraftfarm.com

Brooklyn Cultural Adventures Program
www.heartofbrooklyn.org/bcap

Brooklyn Dance Project
www.brooklyndanceproject.com

Brooklyn Design Lab
www.brooklyndesignlab.org

Brooklyn Guitar School
www.brooklynguitarschool.com

Brooklyn Player
web.me.com/corinnegood/Brookyn_Players/Home.html

Brooklyn Queens Conservatory of Music
www.bqcm.org

Brooklyn Robot Foundry
brooklynrobotfoundry.com

Brooklyn Society Ethical Culture
www.bsec.org

Camp Friendship
www.campfriendshipbrooklyn.com

Camp Olympia
www.campolympiany.com

Carmelo the Science Fellow at the Cosmic Grove
carmelothesciencefellow.com

Chai Tots
www.chaitotspreschool.com

Chelsea Piers
www.chelseapiers.com/camps.html

Childs Play
childsplayny.com

Congregation Beth Elohim
www.congregationbethelohim.org

Construction Kids
www.constructionkids.com

Creative Cooks
creativecooks.us

Creative Theatrics
www.whitebirdproductions.org

Curious Jane
curiousjanecamp.com

Dancewave Inc
www.dancewave.org

Ezra Guitar
www.ezraguitar.com/teachers.html

Homage
homagebrooklyn.com

John’s Boys & Girls Camp
www.johnsboysandgirls.org

Juguemos A Cantar
www.juguemos.org

Kamp 4 Kidz
www.kamp4kidz.com

Kensington Stables
www.kensingtonstables.com

Kim’s Kids Summer Camp
www.kimskidscamp.com

Mark Morris Dance Group
markmorrisdancegroup.org

Natural Wonders
www.naturalwonderscamp.com

New York Chess & Games
www.newyorkchessandgames.com

NYC Explorers
www.nycityexplorers.com

Park Explorers
www.parkexplorers.com

Park Slope Day Camp
www.parkslopedaycamp.com

Park Slope/Armory YMCA
www.ymcanyc.org/prospect-park

Park Slope Rock School
www.psrockschool.com

Poly Prep
www.polyprep.org

Powerplay
www.powerplaykids.com

Prospect Park Tennis Camp
www.prospectpark.org/tennis

Prospect Park Zoo
www.prospectparkzoo.com

Spoke The Hub
www.spokethehub.org/camps

Streb Laboratory For Action Mechanics
www.streb.org

Studio Creative Play
www.studiocreativeplay.org

Textile Arts Center
www.textileartscenter.com

Trapeze School New York
www.trapezeschool.com

Willie Mae Rock Camp for Girls
www.williemaerockcamp.org

VideoKid Brooklyn
www.videokidbrooklyn.com

Sh*t Park Slope Parents Say

March 23, 2012 By admin Filed Under: Community

It all started with Susan Fox. Fox, who manages the website ParkSlopeParents.com, had been following the slew of Sh*t videos (her favorite being Sh*t Guys Don’t Say) popping up on the Internet and wondered what those Park Slope parents would say if they had a video of their own. You know, those parents who offer responses like, “Sorry, can’t, have my child care shift at the Coop” or “Meet you at Mommy and Me yoga class.”

So she posted the Sh*t New Yorkers Say video to her list serve – which goes out to approximately 5,100 members and generates 50 e-mails on any given day and posed the question for fun. What came next ended up fueling the script for the Sh*t Park Slope Parents Say video written and produced by Katie Goodman and Soren Kisiel. The pair, who own and produce Broad Comedy, a five-woman sketch comedy troupe, also starred in the video with Goodman’s cousin Julie Kay.

“Susan saw Katie’s current show, “I Didn’t Fuck it Up,” at the Triad Theater, contacted us and said ‘hey would you like to make this? It seemed like great fun,’” Kisiel said, adding the pair just happened to have time to pull it off. “She handed over all those ideas and we wrote some of our own and off it went.”

According to Fox, she received more than 40 e-mails with suggestions just 24 hours after posting that e-mail on the list serve. She contacted Goodman, who Fox had first met online, then at a holiday party, culminating with seeing Goodman in action at her comedy show. By Feb. 3, Goodman had signed on and by Feb. 5, Kisiel and Goodman sent a script to Fox for her reaction. The video was shot on Feb. 7 by James Schlittenhart and as of Feb. 9, the now infamous Sh*t Park Slope Parents Say video, which is just under four minutes, was born.

“It is like the fastest thing we’ve ever done because most of our stuff is highly complex music videos which takes months,” Goodman said. Some of her well-known music videos through Broad Comedy include “Soccer Mom Ho” and “MILF,” which Fox had seen and loved – and ultimately prompted her to see Goodman’s one-woman show.
“Katie and Soren are so talented,” Fox said. “I would love to see her take off. She’s so good at physical comedy as you can see in the video.”

Goodman was excited to take on the project but made sure that many of the ideas came from Park Slope Parents since she and Kisiel just moved to Carroll Street in August. Though new to Park Slope and P.S. 321 where their 9-year-old son attends, the family had stayed in the area while performing a show last year. They currently split their time between Brooklyn and Bozeman, Montana.

In deciding upon content for the video, she and Kisiel opted out of rehashing material that was already done in the other Sh*t videos – such as the ‘oh, we don’t have a TV’ and ‘a big stress on organic food and bagels.’

“We tried to pick stuff we hadn’t seen and that was really specific to parents and Park Slope parents in particular,” Kisiel said. “We wanted to keep things as specific as possible to the community.”

The pair poked fun at everything from organic milk being on sale for $6.99 to parking the car, to taking a food processor a neighbor left outside to the slapstick bit of Goodman fumbling with a baby carriage up a hill in Prospect Park.

“What I like about the video is that it shows we can make fun of ourselves and not take ourselves so seriously,” Fox said. “The whole series with the car is really true, the stroller down the stairs with too much stuff, all of those things are what Park Slope parents live. It allowed us to make fun of ourselves and to laugh at our sometimes obsessiveness over things.”

The blue “boy’s” hat bit was a nod to the 2006 controversy that spun out on the list serve regarding someone finding the outerwear and describing it as “Found: boy’s hat.” What ensued was a heated discussion about gender politics and a write-up in New York Magazine and Gawker.

“People have been picking on those Park Slope parents for basically ever since that came out,” Fox said of the hat incident. “We are on year number six of being the bane of jokes about entitled parents.”

Still Fox said the video has generated a lot of positive responses – as of Feb. 19, the video received 72,000 hits on YouTube and for the most part, the responses have been positive.

“Around the neighborhood, on the street, we have been getting recognized quite a lot,” Kisiel said. “People actually come up with their own – ‘oh you left out the double-wide stroller,’ that kind of thing.”

But Kisiel said he was surprised at the interest of people outside of the neighborhood. The Gothamist wrote posts about discouraging the video from being made. “I was just making it for the people in the community,” he said.
And those within the community have enjoyed it. Even the blog F’d in Park Slope wrote they got it right in their Feb. 10 post on the video for mention of the “Nannygate Scandal,” or “Our nanny does my [Coop] shift,” even if earlier they were raging against the possibility.

Kerri Doherty, managing editor of the blog, said though these “Shit Everyone and Their Mom Say” videos are way beyond expiration date, she admits she can’t help but watch them and in this case, Kisiel and Goodman represented well.

“Sh*t Park Slope Parents Say was playful and funny for the most part, though they did mention a few things that weren’t parent-specific (bitching about parking and restaurants closing, or noticing that Boardwalk Empire was shooting nearby). I liked the almost subtle cameo of the infamous Pepto-Bismol brownstone. I myself don’t have kids but based on what I’ve seen in this neighborhood, I’d say their video was pretty spot on.”

The Observer also picked up on it and noted the short amount of time it took for Fox to get the video out and Curbed NY appreciated the boy’s hat mention and the pink house cameo.

“It’s funny, the people in the neighborhood like it because it’s fun and playful and people outside the neighborhood that have some bizarre interest in not liking this neighborhood also like the video,” Kisiel said. “So that’s been funny to see.”

For more information about Broad Comedy and Goodman’s one-woman show “I Didn’t Fuck It Up”, visit www.broadcomedy.com.

Spring Fever

March 16, 2012 By admin Filed Under: Reader Recommendations

As the weather warms, it’s time to get out and explore what’s new in Park Slope this season. If you have something you would like to share, send it along to us.

Edible Brooklyn: The Cookbook

Edited by Rachel Wharton

According to foodies, Brooklyn has been hailed as the new frontier for chefs. Without the borders imposed by Manhattan and with growing competition, Brooklyn chefs have found that creativity and passion endear them to the locals. A number of remarkable cookbooks have come out in the past year devoted to our favorite borough. My issue with these predecessors is that while they do include recipes from local chefs and restaurateurs, the recipes included are so complicated it seems that they’re really intended to get people into the restaurants themselves. Edible Brooklyn: The Cookbook follows the format of featuring and focusing on local restaurants and food sources, but the difference is that the real focus is on the recipes themselves. It is a true cookbook. The recipes are uncomplicated, using easily sourced ingredients and a few steps. The photos that accompany them are nothing short of mouth-watering. Edible Brooklyn: The Cookbook has really found the perfect balance of neighborhood guide and cookbook. The stories behind each establishment are compelling, but not overwhelming, highlighting the uniqueness of the borough while underlining the importance of the food itself.

Video Kid Brooklyn

In this digital age, video devices are not only affordable but are also extremely user-friendly. Whereas a generation ago even making home movies involved carrying a heavy VHS camera and home editing suites were cost-prohibitive to most, the new era has ushered in the ability to make films and shorts from your computer. Kids have a unique eye and panache for creativity, Video Kid taps into this ability by offering video production classes for children ages 5-12. This film school offers production classes focusing on the basics and fundamentals, teaching skills in a way that children understand. Students are able to put these skills to work in a real-world way, by creating their own video shorts. To view class projects, learn about classes and sign up for the summer season, visit www.videokidbrooklyn.com

Brooklyn Skillshare

One of the amazing things about living in Brooklyn is that no matter how obscure your hobby or interest may be, you are bound to find other people who share your interest. Brooklyn Skillshare offers an open opportunity to hone your skills and learn more. Classes are taught by people within the community who possess a passion and knowledge that they would like to pass on to others. They are also free (unless noted otherwise on their site) and cover a diverse set of topics: Making Homemade Baby Food, How To Plan And Enjoy A Multi-Day Bike Trip, How To Make Smart-Ass Robots, and Producing A Documentary From Scratch, are just a sampling. If you have a skill you would like to share, there is an open call for teachers. Classes are held throughout the season and the Tea Lounge hosts Skillshare Night on the first Tuesday of every month. For a list of upcoming classes, visit www.brooklynskillshare.org

Green-wood Cemetery

It’s just a couple of quick stops away on the F-train and offers a plethora of borough history. Not only is it a beautiful place for a stroll and some quiet peaceful reflection, but throughout the season, the cemetery hosts a number of events and tours. Learn more about history during the RMS Titanic and Green-wood: 100 Years Later Trolley Tour; learn more about the indigenous flora and fauna with their mulch (bring your own bag) and Azaleas & Dogwood Trolley Tour and bird-watching walking tour; the Green-wood’s Great Women Walking Tour focuses on the historical highlights of the cemetery. Join in for a night of music at the chapel, or create your own walking tour as you amble along the serene 478 acres of hills and valleys that overlook Manhattan. Founded in 1838 as on the America’s first rural cemeteries, the location gained historic landmark status in 2006. Some of its more famous residents include Leonard Bernstein, Jean-Michel Basquiat and Boss Tweed. Green-wood Cemetery is located at 500 25th Street. Admission is free, with additional fees for tours and events. For directions and a full list of all the events and tours, go to www.green-wood.com

Moral Eyes

Inspired by the success of TOMs Shoes, Joe Sachs embarked on his own accessory company that benefits those in need. Park Slope-based Moral Eyes offers affordable reading glasses and sun readers in a wide range of styles. They are fun, fashionable and practical. Like the shoe company, whenever a pair of Moral Eyes glasses is purchased, the company donates a pair of glasses to someone in need. In addition to this initiative, Moral Eyes has also partnered with the non-profit organization New Eyes for the Needy setting up locations where old frames can be donated and recycled. Recycling locations can be found throughout Brooklyn. Locally, you can try on a selection of the Moral Eyes reading glasses at the Community Bookstore (143 Seventh Avenue). You can learn more about Moral Eyes on their website, www.moraleyes.com

Read Any Good Books Lately?

December 22, 2011 By admin Filed Under: Books

Something not to miss: The tenth anniversary of September 11 inspired me to re-read Jonathan Safran Foer’s masterful second novel, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close —a story of love, loss and reunion set in the shadow of the tragedy at the World Trade Center. Since “the worst day” when his dad was killed in the terrorist attack, nine-year-old Oskar Schell has “heavy boots.” Francophile, tambourine player and inventor, precocious Oskar specializes in imaginative creations that help protect the people he loves, even himself. For example, “I could invent a teakettle that reads in Dad’s voice, so I could fall asleep…” One day, Oskar discovers an unusual key in his father’s closet and it becomes his “ultimate raison d’être” to find the matching lock. From Harlem to Coney Island, Oskar travels the five boroughs of New York City on a mission to find the lock that he believes will connect him to his missing father. Many quirky and kind people help him on his quest including his reclusive 103-year-old neighbor who tells Oskar, “So many people enter and leave your life! Hundreds and thousands of people! You have to keep the door open so they can come in! But it also means you have to let them go!” A mysterious renter who lives in his grandma’s apartment aids Oskar in another of his secret missions to bring the story full circle. At times hilarious, often heartwrenching, Foer’s book is extremely original and incredibly wise.

Something old: Italo Calvino’s The Baron in the Trees (translated from Italian) is the fantastic tale of Cosimo Piovasco di Rondò who on the fifteenth of June 1767 in Ombrosa, Italy, refuses to eat his plateful of snails at the royal family dinner table. Compounding his rebellion against parental authority, twelve-year-old Cosimo escapes to the trees and declares, “I’ll never come down again!” And he never does. “The trees were so thick [Cosimo] could move for several miles passing from one branch to another, without ever needing to descend to earth.” Narrated with love and admiration by his younger brother, Biagio, the rich life of the Baron in the trees unfolds. Cosimo hunts, forages and fishes to provide food, clothing and shelter. Though perched in the trees, Cosimo stays connected to his fellow man. He makes friends, adopts a dachshund, helps with irrigation projects, fights pirates and forest fires, aids armies and even has love affairs. By some considered crazy, by others thought wise, “This [Cosimo] understood: that association renders men stronger and bring’s out each person’s best gifts, and gives a joy which is rarely to be had by keeping to oneself…” Cosimo studies philosophy, reads voraciously and ponders the ideals of a universal society. He interacts with Diderot and Napoleon. By the end of his life, Cosimo understands “something that was all-embracing, and he could not say it in words but only by living as he did. Only by being so frankly himself as he was till his death could he give something to all men.”

Something for young adults or older: A Northern Light is Jennifer Donnelly’s compassionate coming-of-age novel about Mattie Gokey, a sixteen-year-old girl living and dreaming on her families’ farm in the North Woods of New York state in 1906. Mattie is a gifted writer who desperately wants to go to college but “ [I] saw what was in store for me: a whole summer of drudgery and no money for it. Cooking, cleaning…feeding chickens, slopping pigs…doing everything that fell on the eldest in a family of four girls, a dead mother, and a pissant brother who took off to drive boats on the Erie Canal.” Mattie astutely observes issues of class, race, and gender and the constraints put upon women by society at the turn of the century. Mattie acknowledges that she is “wanting things I have no business wanting, and what they call a gift seems to me more like a burden.” Against her pa’s wishes, Mattie takes a job at the lakeside Glenmore Hotel where a young female guest, Grace Brown, begs Mattie to burn a bundle of letters. The story opens dramatically with Grace discovered drowned then shifts between present and past as Mattie comes to understand her own life as well as Grace’s. “Right now I want a word that describes the feeling you get—a cold, sick feeling deep down inside—when you know something is happening that will change you, and you don’t want it to, but you can’t stop it.” With a love of language akin to Mattie’s, Donnelly weaves together the yearnings of Mattie and Grace in this heartfelt historical fiction novel of deception, romance and self-awareness.

Something for you and a younger reader: Of his many delightful stories for kids, Dick King-Smith’s A Mouse Called Wolf is one of my favorites. While the other twelve mouse pups had ordinary names like Tom or Ann, Mary, the mother mouse, decides “that the thirteenth and littlest must have not one but two names, and important-sounding names at that…” Named from a scrap of sheet music, Wolfgang Amadeus Mouse (“Wolf” for short) has the perfect name! One of Wolf’s favorite pastimes is listening to Mrs. Honeybee, the lady of the house, as she practices the piano each day. “If only mice could sing, thought Wolf…Then to his total surprise, out of that little mouth came a high clear lovely little voice that sang every note of the melody to perfection.” Gradually lured by chocolates to the center of the piano, Wolf comes face to face with the gentle and eager Mrs. Honeybee who wants the same thing that Wolf wants—to make beautiful music together. From nursery rhymes to classics, Wolf sings while Mrs. Honeybee accompanies him. Until one day, Mrs. Honeybee has an accident and can’t make it to her usual place at the piano. Though small in size, Wolf relies on his enormous talents to help. “Bravo, mouse!” From his experience as a farmer and a teacher, King-Smith creates loveable animal critters. Other enjoyable tales by King-Smith include: Ace: The Very Important Pig and Babe: The Gallant Pig that became an award-winning movie.

In addition to classic and current fiction, Michele enjoys reading many of her children’s favorites. For over twenty years, Michele has been art directing and designing books and magazines for kids of all ages. You can see her work at www.micheleweisman.com

Climax Community

December 22, 2011 By admin Filed Under: The Afterlife

Autumn is giving way to Winter here in Geneva. The leaves are mostly fallen except for the golden topped hardwoods that rise above our gravel road like the arches of a cathedral. I have taken to incessantly posting photos of this route on Facebook: photos taken at dusk and dawn, photos with children for scale, photos of VERY RED leaves. The diminishing “likes” and comments hint at what I know in my heart: there can be too much of a good thing.

Now that most of the leaves are gone, I have ample opportunity to make a study of the woods. I do this mainly on my way to retrieve the Finger Lakes Times, a publication I read, in spite of my unfortunate tendency to fall into an involuntary comatose-like state when confronted with the physicality of newsprint. I read it because, having moved the hell up here, I want to be here.
I am impatient to feel that sense of connection and assuredness that developed over more than a decade in Brooklyn. What mix of small talk with the couple at Art Dry Cleaning, bumping into friends and untold breakfasts at The Purity made it home? I want to know what’s what and who’s who and why. I want to know NOW! The daily journey to the mail box is maddeningly slow like Tai Chi, or turning the pages of the newspaper.

Now that the foliage beneath the big trees has subsided, I have discovered that much of the sloping forest surrounding our house is, in fact, a gothic horror. Our woods are choked with a sinister invader with sooty bark and hideously twisted limbs. If evil were a shrub, it would be Rhammnus Cathartica, the Common Buckthorn.

Introduced as an exotic garden shrub by insane Victorians, Rhammnus Cathartica has infested the country from Nova Scottia to Wisconsin and shows no signs of stopping. It produces shiny black berries with a purgative effect. The birds eat them and duly deposit the seeds hither and yon, complete with a blanket of slimy fertilizer. The buckthorn is so thick in some places near the house that it is nearly impossible to walk in a straight line, without resorting to the machete I carry in my purse.

We have more than our fair share because not so long ago, our land was cultivated. When the farm packed up, the fallow fields provided the perfect habitat for the buckthorn and now there is no end to them. For every dead shrub another four appear at its feet. They sprout, die and putrefy only to rise hydra-like from the forest floor. Nature’s plan has gone horribly awry.

It isn’t supposed to be this way. In a world without exotic species, the forest returns in stages: first the shrubs, the jack pine, the wild rose and honeysuckle, then a few young tree. As the trees grow and begin to block out the light, the composition of the understory begins to change. The plants in the first wave die off enriching the soil and creating the basis for the next succession of flora. These in turn create conditions for the mature forest or as (evidently purulent) environmental scientists refer to it, the “climax community”.

Enter the buckthorn. It just will not go away. It crowds out all the native species, destroying the herbaceous ground cover. Once established is extremely difficult to get rid of.The nitrogen content of its fallen leaves changes the very composition of the soil making it inhospitable to everything except MORE BUCKTHORN.

Mowing merely slows it down. Cutting it back only works in conjunction with the judicious application of Roundup. Burning is very effective until some wretched bird poops more seeds on your parade.

I often think how I would like to do something about the the buckthorn. Some days I fantasize about conducting a controlled burn after which I will swoop in with a truck load of native saplings. This fancy only lasts a few minutes before the image in my mind’s eye becomes a blazing inferno engulfing our house. Other days l picture myself (in a suit of armor) wrenching them from the ground with the big garden fork. The drama appeals and yet, I suspect deep down that there are no easy answers.

Now and then I peruse scholarly articles on reforestation. Most of them are over my head, but I did come across one study in New Hampshire that was reassuring the way only science that confirms your own prejudices can be. It was weak, purely correlative and it dealt with the Glossy Buckthorn, Rhammnus Cathartica’s evil twin. But it felt right, if not about the forest then about the trees. It hinted that once newly planted saplings, the dogwood, ash, birch and cottonwood take hold, the buckthorn will probably perish on its own. It just takes Time.

As I walk back with the paper I try to imagine the woods without the buckthorn and wonder if I’ll live to see it. The obituaries and birth announcements are located inside the front cover of the paper. Did Mary, beloved wife to Joe and mother to four know the woods without it? Will baby Louis born to Jessica and Martin walk on an open carpet of color beneath the tall hardwoods?

I study the names, the Irish and Italian ones repeated though the paper and printed on the sides of trucks or over shops around town, the Spanish names of the laborers who work in the farms and orchards, names of Chinese or Indian scientists at the agricultural experiment station. All of them have roots here. I make a mental note to ask them about the buckthorn.

My neighbor, tells me that Ontario County holds a sale each year where residents can buy native trees at a reduced rate. She has already planted some in the brush behind her house. I make a silent promise to the woods that I will do the same. She doesn’t know when exactly. I should just look for it in the Finger Lakes Times.

Down But Not Out

December 22, 2011 By admin Filed Under: Hypocrite's Almanac

How are you? I’m just okay. Why just okay? Isn’t this the holiday season? Don’t I feel the warm coziness of brotherly/sisterly love, the glow of good will toward all, the peacefulness that comes with expressing gratitude for all that I do have? Nope, I feel none of that. I hate to get all doom and gloom on you but there is a mood around my neighborhood that is downright oppressive. We are on hard times. It’s not Grapes of Wrath-pack–up-the-truck times, but the vibe has most definitely changed.

It’s palpable when I get off the subway in downtown Brooklyn and I pass the people waiting in line for food stamps verification. I’ve noticed that the line is growing a little longer every week. I’ve also noticed more people are aimlessly walking around the streets near my apartment. Not homeless people, rather people without the need to be places on time, people without places to go during the day. And it seems that the shady characters asking for money on the train now seem kind of legitimate. The guy who lost his job and needs to get enough money together to feed his family might actually be telling the truth.

If this “economic downturn” has affected you directly then you have little energy to spare. You are sweating through your savings or tumbling into debt. It’s crappy to say the least. If you are comfortable, I’m sure you see what’s going on. Keep an eye on those who don’t have what they need. Stick your neck out, but carefully. It’s getting a little scary out there. We need to look out for one another.

Wow. This column is so not funny. Here’s a joke. A three legged dog walks into a bar and says, “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw…” Not a great joke, but not horrible, right? Believe me, a lot of time was wasted on some awful jokes sites and that was the only one that I thought wasn’t hideous and that you might not have heard. Hope I was right. So onto your letters. We had a lot to choose from this time but I can only have room for two. Hope the rest of you guys find another hypocritical free-of-charge life coach and get some help. Some of your problems were pretty hellacious (to Weird Rash in Windsor Terrace, go see Dr. Marc Avram in Brooklyn Heights. He’s amazing!).

Dear Hypocrite,
I am having a real problem with my downstairs neighbor. I’m an unemployed single mom of a son who’s four. My neighbor, a single man in his forties who works from home, complains that our noise wakes him up in the morning, keeps him awake at night, prevents him from working, makes his life impossible to live, etc. He comes up and lectures me, he slides notes under the door, he phones, he texts, he emails. He’s recently taken to pounding on the ceiling with a broom, I think. Or maybe it’s a long pole he purchased especially for that purpose. In his most recent letter, he composed a list of what he called “Helpful Hints”. Some of the suggestions were to remove shoes the minute we get in the house (we do), put down another carpet (we have), restrict my son’s playing to the bathroom (are you serious?) and try get him out of the house as soon as he wakes up (come on!). The next day I sent him a list called “More Helpful Hints” which suggested that he try to do his work at Starbucks, put earplugs in, glue noise reducing foam to his ceiling, and get a girlfriend and sleep at her house. Yeah, it’s not civil anymore. Another thing is I’m pregnant, so although the noise is going to get a little better as my son gets older, I’m bringing another noisemaker into the world. I haven’t told him this yet but I have to admit I’m looking forward seeing the look on his face when I start showing.

As you can tell, it’s a pretty bad situation. What makes it even a little worse is that I’m Israeli and I think he’s Palestinian. Maybe he’s from Lebanon. Either way, there’s some unpleasant history between our people and I can’t help but think that exacerbates the whole thing. Do you have any ideas on how to solve our problem? It can’t be expensive. Remember, I’m not working at the moment.

Signed,
Noisy Neighbor in North Slope

Noisy Neighbor,
I’m sorry, you’re pregnant? I really was on your side until you dropped that bomb. You’re a single mom, unemployed and you’re pregnant. Dude, I’m a life coach. You’re what we call in the industry a charity case. You need help. Do you have family nearby? If they are all in Israel, you should seriously consider moving back. That might just get rid of all your problems. This country is going down (see first couple paragraphs of this column). You can get out and your kids will get to know their heritage. That’s solution #1. I strongly recommend it. (And remember, overseas travel is best before your 8th month, so get a move on.)

Solution #2: Get help. Ask your landlord for some suggestions. Chances are he/she has been through this before. Look, your neighbor’s never had a child, and you’ve never been a forty-year-old bachelor who works from home. With the added issue of the history of your countries, you are in need a mediator. You might have an asshole living below you, but I’m not sure. He could be a completely sensible person who is being driven to asshole-ness due to lack of sleep and quiet during early morning and working hours. If you both set some rules and behave you might just find that you can build a somewhat beneficial relationship. Imagine in four months your Palestinian/Lebanese neighbor comes over for falafel and insists that you go out on your own to a movie while he puts your son to bed. That’s the kind of story the New York Times would love to feature in their City Room blog. And it’d be so nice to cut it out, frame it and hang it in the bathroom where your son plays, wouldn’t it?

In the meantime, while things are in this state, kill him with kindness. Tidy up the mail table by recycling all the catalogs and free papers. Vacuum the hallway. The packaged banana bread from Trader Joes is not that bad. Bake a loaf and leave it on his doorstep with a note that just says “Sorry for the noise, we’re working on it!” Have your son sign it with his cute little kid scrawl. It will stupefy your neighbor and buy you some time while your landlord gets around to calling you back. Guaranteed.

Dear Hypocrite,
I’ve been doing a lot of favors for people. I’ve been walking people’s dogs, picking up people’s children, making people food when they are sick. I’m exhausted. I know my friends appreciate what I do, I’m just feeling overwhelmed and in need of some payback. I’m all favored out. How can I let them know without hurting our friendships?

Fed Up in Flatbush

Fed Up,
There is rhythm to the giving and receiving of help and it sounds like the pendulum has swung too far in the giving direction. Although I am certain that it will swing back, it sounds like you’re in need of a ‘Me, Damnit!’ Day. Get a massage, buy yourself flowers and say no to the next person who asks for a favor. I don’t know why the rhythm is off-balance for you. Life is like that sometimes. When I broke my wrist, I went through a huge period of receiving only. After I finally got the cast off, I had some serious love in my heart for all the people that came to my aid. Chances are that someday, you too could find yourself needing lots of help—with your kids or pets, with your laundry, with healing your heart. I hope you don’t. But chances are you will. This help might not actually come from the people you’re helping now. It’s a little sloppy that way. Help is going to come from people you haven’t even met yet.

In the meantime, ask for a little help here and there just to keep the blood flowing. Can someone return your library book while you’re on vacation? Can someone lend you their expensive German lice comb? (I’m not making this up. I borrowed one last year and still haven’t given it back. It’s awse.) Can someone put the left over venison from the hunt in their freezer until the jerky-making party? (I made that one up.) If you come to the conclusion that you’re constantly doing things for others and no one ever comes to your aid even when you ask, then get a new group of friends. Join a church, mosque or temple. Or all three. Those people will seriously do anything you ask. Unless you ask them to tell you that God does not exist. They’re funny that way. They won’t even say it as a joke.
It will all even out in the end. Or if it doesn’t, that’s okay too. Get ready for some wisdom: Life isn’t fair. Have you ever heard that one before? If I could give you a visual, I’d show you some pictures of kids in Somalia waiting. Waiting for what? Food. Water. Medical supplies. Basically, they are waiting for favors from people they’ll never be able to repay.

Sheesh. That took a tough turn at the end. Is it time for another joke? I think it’s time for you to tell me one. See you next time.

Small Business Secrets of the Slope

December 22, 2011 By admin Filed Under: Friends & Neighbors

Shopping may be changing with the internet age, but Park Slope’s storefront-lined avenues still sparkle, offering what the web sites can’t — a sense of community alight with charm, care, and collaboration. We met owners of four local businesses — a photography studio, an art gallery, and two designer jewelry and clothing boutiques — to find out what makes running a business in Park Slope unique and what they have planned for next year.

“Park Slope has become much more of a shopping destination, even for tourists and people coming from Manhattan,” says Diana Kane, whose boutique on 5th Avenue and President Street has been in business for the past nine years. Aside from showcasing handmade rings, pendants, beaded necklaces, earrings, and other items from her jewelry line, Diana also sells shoes, clothing, lingerie, and accessories from sustainable, hard-to-find, and independent designers including locals like Aki Kano and Megan Noonan for Marijn Bennett, Prairie Underground from Seattle, and Belgium’s Mia Zia. “I feel like the closer you are to the source and the least poison you can put on your body, around your body, in the atmosphere – that’s important to me,” Diana says. “As a mother especially, it becomes clear that your choices across the spectrum make a difference, so you might as well go greener.

Diana has stocked her store with plenty of designer items perfect for holiday shopping – seasonal coats and dresses, locally-made handbags, cozy cashmere pop-top gloves and arm warmers, and Diana’s own jewelry. When it comes to choosing products and designers for her store, she likes to keep it simple: “If I want it, I figure most of the time somebody else will too. That’s the most consistent thread through this store.” Diana says that running a business is always challenging – “it’s all about recognizing your neighborhood, knowing who your customers are, and just being available to them.”

Tara Silderberg at The Clay Pot on 7th Avenue has years of experience finding some of the most unique jewelry designers, and her relationship with her jewelers seals the deal for personal service. “I think we may be partially responsible for the Park Slope baby boom,” she says with a smile. “All these starry-eyed young couples come out here to look at wedding bands and then see all the kids and babies – you can draw your own conclusion.” While their bridal service attracts customers from all over, the store inspires loyalty from neighbors who’ve been coming by since Tara’s parents opened the business in 1969.

The Clay Pot carries a wide array of jewelry from designers like Alexis Bittar, Susan Fleming, Patricia Locke, and Ten Thousand Things. “By being loyal to my jewelers, I in turn can get amazing favors done for my customers. I had a request from a dear customer, who is also a friend, this summer after his wife suddenly passed away, to turn a strand of pearls they had purchased together into a bracelet for him and a necklace for his daughter. Not only did my jeweler do this for me in a week, but they didn’t charge us. While things like this don’t happen every day, it is an example of the tight-knit nature of what I do.”

440 Gallery, a gallery and artist collective on 6th Avenue and 9th Street, shares a similar in-tune relationship with the neighborhood and with its artists. “I was anxious to have a steady place to show my work,” says Nancy Lunsford, who co-founded the gallery in December 2004 along with ten other artists. The space is currently booked for the next seven years and showcases solo exhibits in its front area and the ongoing work of its members near the back – an inviting setup that gives visitors and potential buyers an art experience that’s both collaborative and ever-evolving. “It’s funny because art is a commodity, but you’re really paying for that emotional connection,” says Nancy, whose experience selling art goes back to her days as a street portraiture artist outside the Grand Ole Opry when she was nineteen.

“The comment we hear from people who are familiar with galleries and have gone to our space is that the prices are so reasonable for the quality. A large part of that is because we are a collective – we don’t have as high an overhead as some other galleries,” Nancy says. “The fourteen artists we have right now are very strong in their fields. We like to keep a variety – we’re abstract, we’re realists, we’re photographers, we have collage, sculpture – we work for a constant balance.” Nancy and her fellow artists will host their annual Small Works Show from December 8th through January 7th then bring another year of exhibitions, both from the collective and other artists, to the neighborhood.

At Roberto Falck Photography next to Union Market on 6th Avenue, Roberto and partner Rachel Elkind have been photographing weddings, babies, children, and family portraits for the past six years. Roberto opened his Park Slope studio after stumbling across the available storefront while visiting his brother, which is when the business evolved from wedding photography to family photography as well. “Park Slope is a magnet for couples who are thinking of growing a family,” he says, noting that he and Rachel want to be “more than a ‘wedding photographer’ – we want to be their family photographer.” That’s why many of Roberto’s clients keep coming back, whether they live in the neighborhood, Manhattan, or beyond: “The family starts growing, they start having kids, and they come back to us.”

When it comes to plans for next year, Roberto says “I see it as a progression. We not only want to grow the business, but we want to be in tune with what’s going on here. What gets me the most excited is the challenge of trying to get something different with every client that we have.” For Diana Kane, 2012 will be another year spent designing jewelry, finding fun and sustainable goodies to sell in her store, and spending time with her family. What’s kept her business so successful? “I think it’s being part of your community, knowing your customers, being friendly and not pushy – those are the things that have kept us here. That, and always keeping a consistent viewpoint about what we like.” Tara Silderberg has a similar year ahead filled with hunting down new designs for The Clay Pot, but she prefers to sum up her outlook with a quote from E.B. White: “I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.” But there’s one thing they can all count on: Shopping trends may change, but when you make the extra effort to connect with customers and neighbors on a grassroots level, not only can you survive, but you can flourish.

The Clay Pot
162 7th Avenue
clay-pot.com

Diana Kane
229 5th Ave #B
dianakane.com

Gallery 440
440 6th Avenue
440gallery.com

Roberto Falck Photography
217 6th Avenue
robertofalck.com