• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Read An Issue
  • About
  • Advertising Information
  • Where to Find the Reader
  • Subscribe to our Mailing List
  • Contact Us

Park Slope Reader

  • The Reader Interview
  • Eat Local
  • Dispatches From Babyville
  • Park Slope Life
  • Reader Profile
  • Slope Survey

Community

All Politics is Local

April 29, 2025 By Lauren Hartley Filed Under: Community, Park Slope Life

New York City’s 2025 Mayoral Primary: What You Need to Know

On June 24, New York City voters will head to the polls for the Democratic mayoral primary, a crucial contest that will likely determine the city’s next mayor. With Democrats’ strong majority hold in the city, the winner of the primary will be the frontrunner in November’s general election. 

Why This Election Matters

The mayor of New York City leads the nation’s most populous city, overseeing policies that impact millions of residents and often influencing the governance of other cities nationally and globally. The position comes with enormous responsibilities—shaping economic policy, public safety, housing, and infrastructure—all with great capacity to affect the daily lives of New Yorkers.

How Ranked-Choice Voting Works

In New York City, primaries use ranked-choice voting, allowing voters to rank up to five candidates in order of preference. However, there is no penalty for just voting for one candidate. If you do rank your top five choices, your vote is counted for your top choice first. If no candidate wins more than 50 percent of the vote, the candidate with the fewest votes is eliminated. Ballots for that candidate then transfer to voters’ next-ranked choices. This process continues in rounds until one candidate secures a majority.

A Look at New York City’s Recent Influential Mayors

New York City’s past mayors have shaped the city in significant ways. Here’s a brief overview of some of the most notable:

Fiorello La Guardia (1934-1946). In his obituary in The Guardian, La Guardia is described as “the most remarkable mayor of a great city in American history.” Born to an Italian father, when he became mayor he had climbed higher on the political ladder than any other Italian-American. He was considered a “New Dealer” — a politician who avidly supported New Deal policies — and was successful in his vision of boosting the economy, creating jobs, and expanding infrastructure in New York. His legacy includes La Guardia Airport and Flushing Meadows Park. La Guardia presciently recognized the dangers of Nazi Germany and used his platform to criticize Hitler before World War II, so much so that the U.S. Secretary of State apologized for his remarks to the Nazi government.

Ed Koch (1978-1989). Outspoken and combative, Koch was both a beloved and divisive figure. When he became mayor, New York City was suffering from urban decay and Koch launched initiatives to revitalize abandoned housing, clean up public spaces, and transform Times Square from a crime-ridden intersection into a family friendly destination. A champion of the middle class, he prioritized white-collar job growth but was unpopular among Black and LGBTQ New Yorkers. His administration’s slow response to the AIDS crisis, closure of Sydenham Hospital in Harlem, and cuts to anti-poverty programs led to lasting resentment. His frayed relationship with Black voters ultimately paved the way for David Dinkins to become the city’s first Black mayor.

Rudy Giuliani (1994-2001). Giuliani was the only mayor in the twentieth century to lose Manhattan but still win office. He is best remembered for his leadership after the 9/11 attacks, earning him the nickname “America’s Mayor” and Time magazine’s Person of the Year. Crime rates fell during his mayorship, attributed to both his tough policing strategies and the simultaneous economic and demographic shifts that were happening nationally. It seemed possible that Giuliani might break the New York City mayoral curse of never reaching a higher office when he became President Trump’s personal lawyer. But some things just don’t wash out.

Michael Bloomberg (2002-2013). A billionaire businessman, Bloomberg took a pragmatic, value-driven approach to governance, accepting only a $1 salary as mayor. A staunch advocate of public health, he banned smoking in bars and parks, required fast food restaurants to show calories counts, and cracked down on the illegal sale of firearms. His rezoning of about 40% of the city increased housing and development, but also gentrification. While his policies made the city more attractive to the middle class, homelessness surged by two-thirds from 2002 to 2011. Bloomberg was criticized for his support of the stop and frisk tactic used by NYPD that disproportionately hurt Black and Latino men. He later apologized for supporting the practice.

Eric Adams (2022–present). Whether reelected or not, Adams will go down in history as the only sitting New York City mayor to be indicted.

Who’s Running in the 2025 Mayoral Race?

As of now, several candidates have declared their candidacy:

Eric Adams — Incumbent mayor

Andrew Cuomo — Former governor

Brad Lander — City comptroller

Zellnor Myrie — Brooklyn state senator

Zohran Mamdani — Queens state representative

Scott Stringer — Former city comptroller

Jessica Ramos — Queens state senator

Adrienne Adams — N.Y.C. council speaker

After months of speculation, Former Gov. Cuomo formally entered the race on March 1. With name recognition from his decade as governor, he is expected to be a frontrunner. While governor, he accomplished infrastructure improvement, the legalization of same sex marriage and marijuana, and became an Emmy winner and household name nationally for his daily Covid-19 briefings, referred to by some as “communal therapy sessions.”

Cuomo’s reputation as “America’s Governor” was quickly tarnished after its culmination when a report from Attorney General Letitia James showed Cuomo underreported nursing home deaths from Covid-19, after ordering nursing homes to accept residents with Covid-19 to preserve hospital capacity. Shortly after, 11 women came forward, some of them current or former state employees, and accused Cuomo of sexual harassment. He resigned in 2021 despite denying the allegations and since, more than 25 million state taxpayer dollars have been spent paying his legal fees. In 2024, the Department of Justice found Cuomo guilty of sexually harassing 13 women who worked for the state over eight years. 

According to Crain’s New York, Cuomo is trying to position himself as a moderate alternative in contrast to City Comptroller Brad Lander, whom he views as a threat. The Park Slope Reader sat down with Brad Lander, who represented Park Slope in city council for three terms before becoming comptroller.  

Lander, while reliably mild-mannered, fights voraciously for what he wants. He doesn’t resort to verbal attacks or aggression, but his impenetrably calm demeanor shouldn’t be equated with weakness of conviction. On the contrary, he’s a paladin for his political agenda, ready to win by means of his lengthy plans. Oh, and he’s not afraid of suing. (Example B).

During his time as comptroller, Lander has condemned Adam’s corrupt behavior and has put pressure on the mayor to submit a timeline and plan for how he will stabilize his administration.

Lander, a progressive, has made ending homelessness for mentally ill New Yorkers a signature campaign issue. He’s not the first mayor who’s tried to take on street homelessness — the two most recent mayors, Adams and Bill de Blasio, each introduced their own plans, but the problem has persisted. 

The comptroller’s housing first approach is modeled after success in cities including Denver, Philadelphia, and Houston. The plan involves placing around 2,000 homeless people with severe mental health issues in vacant apartments, while providing services.

“In Park Slope, we have a meaningful amount of people sleeping on the streets with serious mental illness,” says Lander. “So offering housing to people with support services so that they’re not sleeping on the streets and are much more likely to go off their medication or their treatment and be a danger to themselves and others, that makes a safer neighborhood for everyone.”

Lander credits his time as city councilmember in the 39th District as teaching him key lessons about representing the city. He recalls the neighborhood banding together after Hurricane Sandy to turn the Park Slope Armory into a refuge for seniors who had been displaced from the storm.

“When you engage people in their democracy and then really deliver and serve them well, remarkable things become possible,” says Lander.

Transparency is another focus of Lander’s campaign, differentiating himself from the previous administration. His “Stop the Corruption” plan calls to protect against corruption, by committing to fair hiring tactics, publicly disclosing schedules and meetings, and stricter lobbying regulations. 

“Eric Adams, unfortunately, has failed to deliver on his promises even before he betrayed our trust through so much corruption,” Lander says. “What Park Slope wants is someone who’s honest, who lives up to their word, who listens and engages people and who can then genuinely deliver and make City Hall work for families.”

Lander’s campaign success has been palpable, signified by his lead in campaign funding. His campaign manager, Alison Hirsh, credits this success to a grassroots strategy focused on small-dollar donations from New York City residents through a network of house parties and organizing efforts.

“I have known Brad for 20 years and fundamentally believe that he would be an amazing mayor. He has a unique combination of policy intelligence, human intelligence, management capability and really understands systems and how to make them work and how to make them work on behalf of people,” says Hirsh. “The other thing that makes Brad unique I think, in politics, is that he’s a truly decent human being.”

Filed Under: Community, Park Slope Life

All Politics is Local

February 6, 2025 By Lauren Hartley Filed Under: Community, Park Slope Life, Politiki

Your Local Government Cheat Sheet

With local and state elections around the corner, it can be overwhelming to begin conducting the  necessary research to know the candidates. Consider our new political column as a foundation for you to learn the basics about our city council members, Brooklyn borough president, state senators, and other elected officials who shape our local legislation and policies. 

Who’s Who in Local Government 

I’d be surprised, and maybe even envious, if you didn’t know that we recently had a presidential election. You also probably know about some of the recent state and city-wide ballot measures we had to vote “yes” or “no” on. But the intricacies of local politics that can feel like a game of trivia, and when someone knows the correct answer, you’re left wondering, how do you know that? 

People often interact with their local government more than they do the federal government on a daily basis, yet sare often less informed on current policies and legislation in progress. Here are your local government basics:

City Council

Let’s start with the City Council. In New York City, the City Council is responsible for approving the city’s budget, overseeing city agencies such as the Department of Education and NYPD, introducing and voting on laws, and regulating land use. 

Park Slope is part of City Council District 39, which also includes parts of Kensington, Borough Park, Windsor Terrace, Gowanus, Carroll Gardens, Cobble Hill, Boerum Hill, and the Columbia Waterfront. 

Shahana Hanif is the first woman to represent District 39 in the City Council and made history as the first Muslim woman elected to the City Council when elected in 2021. Since joining City Council, she has passed notable legislation that has mandated universal residential composting, protected and expanded abortion rights in NYC, created an Immigrant Workers’ Bill of Rights, and enacted legislation to establish a program to assist with free door and window repairs for survivors of domestic and gender-based violence. She recently introduced a bill to include Middle Eastern and North African business owners in New York City’s Minority and Women-Owned Business Enterprises program. Hanif was one of the first council members to call for an immediate permanent bilateral ceasefire in Gaza, and was arrested during a Pro-Palestine protest in October 2023.

Election: The City Council will hold its next election in 2025. Council members are elected for a four-year term, except for every twenty years, when they serve a two-year term to allow for redistricting. The last two-year term was in 2023.

Contact info: The best way to reach Hanif’s office for constituent services is at (718) 499-1090 or District39@council.nyc.gov.

Brooklyn Borough President

Borough presidents work with the mayor, advocating on behalf of their borough for land use projects and budget needs. They have limited legislative power but can propose legislation through a council member.

Antonio Reynoso succeeded Eric Adams as Brooklyn borough president. He has recently focused on improving maternal health and reducing health disparities in Brooklyn, creating community baby showers where young families can receive free supplies and resources.

Reynoso has also been a founding member of an anti-NIMBY housing league that embraces development as means to solve New York City’s housing crisis. The league is an alliance of politicians supporting each other push for more construction. Despite his pro-development stance, Reynoso officially disapproved the development of a high rise building at 962-970 Franklin Ave., siding with the Brooklyn Botanic Garden.

Election: Borough presidents serve a four-year term and the next elction will be in 2025.

Contact info: Reynoso’s office can be reached at (718) 802-3700 or at AskReynoso@brooklynbp.nyc.gov.

New York City Mayor

The mayor is at the top of the city government hierarchy. The mayor oversees all local government departments, attends civic ceremonies, implements the City Council’s decision, addresses constituent concerns, and develops policies.

Eric Adams, the 110th mayor of New York City, was elected in 2021. He is the first mayor to be charged with federal crimes and his trial is set to begin on April 21, 2025. 

Mayor Adams campaigned on fighting crime and ‘getting stuff done’. Some of the highlights of his term as mayor include significant school budget cuts, a directive that allows police and medical professionals to involuntarily hospitalize people who appear to be facing severe mental health issues, and investments in affordable housing. 

Election: The mayor serves a four-year term, with the next mayoral election in 2025.

Contact info: To contact the mayor’s office, use the webform at https://www.nyc.gov/office-of-the-mayor/mayor-contact.page. Calling 311 is the best way to receive city-level non-emergency information. 

State Assembly

The New York State Assembly, one of the two chambers that make up the State Legislature, has 150 members. The State Assembly passes bills, raises and lowers taxes, oversees state agencies, and plays a role in allocating budgets.

Robert Carroll has represented District 44 in the New York State Assembly since 2016. He led efforts to create a Dyslexic Task Force Act, a landmark piece of legislation that addresses literacy and dyslexia in the state. He has also been a strong advocate of climate protection legislation and renewable energy, making significant contributions to the Climate Leadership and Community Protection Act.  

Election: Assembly members are elected every two years, with the next election in 2026.

Contact info:  Carroll’s district office can be reached at CarrollR@nyassembly.gov or (718) 788-7221.

State Senate

The New York State Senate drafts, approves, and repeals laws and resolutions, working with the Assembly and Governor to do so. New York has 63 state senators. 

Andrew Gounarde represents all of Park Slope as well as Bay Ridge, Dyker Heights, Sunset Park, Red Hook, Gowanus, Carroll Gardens, Boerum Hill, Cobble Hill, Downtown Brooklyn, Fort Greene, Brooklyn Heights, Vinegar Hill, and DUMBO as senator of New York’s 26th District. He serves as the Chairman of the Committee on Budget and Revenue.

Since his 2019 election, he has introduced and passed legislation to increase drug price transparency, lower hospital costs, and require large public venues in New York to keep epinephrine on hand. He has most recently proposed a ‘Birth Grant,’ a bill that would provide parents in their third trimester who are on Medicaid with $1800.

Election: State senators, like assembly members, are elected every two years, and up for reelection in 2026. 

Contact info: To reach Sen. Gounardes’ office, use gounardes@nysenate.gov or (718) 238-6044.

Zellnor Myrie is Senator of New York’s 20th District which encompasses Central Brooklyn neighborhoods such as Park Slope, Crown Heights, East Flatbush, Prospect Heights, Prospect Lefferts Gardens, and Windsor Terrace.

Sen. Myrie has championed affordable housing, universal after school care, and gun control during his time in office. He is Chair of the Elections Committee and has worked to protect and expand voting rights by simplifying the absentee ballot process and closing the LLC campaign donation loophole. Myrie, who has represented the 20th District in the Senate since 2019, plans to challenge Mayor Eric Adams in the June 2025 primary for mayor.

Election: State senators, like assembly members, are elected every two years, and up for reelection in 2026.

Contact info: The contact information for Sen. Myrie’s office is myrie@nysenate.gov and (718) 284-4700.

New York State Governor

The governor oversees the state executive branch and implements state laws. In New York, that’s Kathy Hochul (66). Gov. Hochul is the first woman to be elected to governor in New York. She recently announced $22 million of funding towards modernizing New York’s electrical grid. Gov. Hochul passed legislation called the Clean Slate Act which recently went into effect. The act will allow for people who have been released from prison and have kept a clean record for a certain amount of time be eligible to have their convictions sealed.

Since the second Trump administration has been announced, Gov. Hochul has dusted off congestion pricing plans and has signed legislation allowing greater access to fluoride for kids.

Election: The governor has a four-year term and is up for reelection in 2026.

Contact info:  To contact Gov. Hochul’s office, use the webform at https://www.governor.ny.gov/content/governor-contact-form or (518) 474-8390. 

House of Representatives

The House of Representatives is made up of 435 elected representatives and is responsible for making and passing federal laws.

Dan Goldman represents New York’s 10th Congressional district, which includes Park Slope and other parts of Western Brooklyn and Lower Manhattan. Goldman has represented New York’s 10th Congressional district since January of 2023. Since being elected to Congress, he has sponsored bills that aim to achieve equal pay, support a transgender day of visibility, and make a plan to stabilize the climate system amid the current climate crisis, among others.

Election: Members of the House of Representative serve two years terms, and the next time they are up for reelection is 2026.

Contact info: Contact Rep. Goldman’s Brooklyn district office at (718) 312-7575 or use his online form which can be found at https://goldman.house.gov/contact. 

Filed Under: Community, Park Slope Life, Politiki

Open Studios Showcases Gowanus: A Neighborhood’s Changing Identity

October 24, 2024 By Lauren Hartley Filed Under: Community, The Arts

By: Lauren Hartley and Jaylen Green

NEW YORK — Blue balloons wrapped door handles across Gowanus Saturday and Sunday, signaling to the public that they could enter to view work created by local artists. 

Gowanus, a neighborhood known for its converted industrial buildings turned art spaces, hosted its 28th year of Open Studios, where hundreds of artists showcase their work out of their homes, studios, galleries, and local businesses, to welcome people into Gowanus and encourage art sales and display.

Arts Gowanus, the event organizer, is an arts and advocacy organization that helps artists across New York City and Gowanus maintain affordable access to studios and living space, publicly showcase their work, and provide resources that allow them to thrive. 

Ella Yang next to her paintings of Park Slope and Gowanus

2024 marks the 21st year Ella Yang has been participating in the Open Studios. When she first joined the Open Studios event, there were about 30 participating artists. Now, there are about 400. 

One of Yang’s exhibits, titled Disappearing Gowanus showcases scenes that have now completely changed – or soon will – due to new high-rise developments, which take advantage of the rezoning near the canals.

“One of the things that was so wonderful about painting here was there was just so much sky,” Yang said, about painting in Gowanus. “There were no tall buildings, especially along the canals. I’ve done like dozens in the last twenty years of paintings of the canals and now the views are going to be completely changed, so I don’t think I’ll be painting a lot of the canal anymore.” 

Rosie Oliveto sits outside the studio home she grew up in. She made the pillows behind her with sustainably sourced materials.

Pointing across the street to the new apartment building that casts a shadow over the studio home she grew up in, Rosie Oliveto reflects on how the neighborhood’s rapid changes have left little space for its artists to make their mark. 

“They’re just trying to make it a bigger and bigger, bigger city and artists are like, wait, we’re here. We’re here too, you know?”

Growing up on Carroll Street, Oliveto was surrounded by artists like her mother that shaped her identity and encouraged self-expression. 

“It’s infectious and amazing because we all can come together as a community and make art shows happen and build on each other instead of like, ‘oh, I’m an artist.’ And then it’s competitive and like everybody’s an artist, it doesn’t feel that way,” she says. “It feels like everybody’s meant to be together.”

Casielle Santos-Gaerlan pictured next to her work

Casielle Santos-Gaerlan sees her art as a search for more belonging. As an American, she feels disconnected from her Filipino heritage. Her work, centered around Brown women, is inspired by her identity and themes of the immigrant experience, colonialism, and how it affects people and the Filipino community.

“A lot of it is also a practice of going back to my roots,” she explains about her art. “As an American I feel really disconnected, I don’t speak the language. A lot of it is a search for finding more belonging.” 

Born, raised, and lives in Park Slope, Santos-Gaerlan has been impacted by gentrification and the changes in the neighborhood. 

“I’ve seen a lot of businesses close and a lot of loved ones leave the neighborhood,” she says. “Eventually I do want to do more work about the neighborhood and race for different spaces that I’ve experienced in my childhood.” 

Gowanus Wine Studio & Tasting Table

Aimee Little, Founder of Gowanus Wine Studio & Tasting Table, has made art an integral part of her business model. Part of the concept from day one was to have art representation from the community, preserving the creative culture that has long been a part of the neighborhood. 

“It’s part of the culture of the neighborhood, that was here first,” Little says. “This is trying to keep in line with the roots of the area.” 

As a long time resident of Gowanus, Little was aware of the anticipated influx of residents to the neighborhood, and strategically opened her business in the developing area.

As the development has begun, but people have not yet moved in, the change in the area looks obvious, but the density that will likely follow with more residences isn’t in full effect yet.

“Change is difficult in some aspects,” notes Little. “I think the Arts Gowanus in particular has done a good job of setting the stage. What they’ve done to advocate for the people that are here is special.”

Kitty McDonough sitting on the stoop to her home selling clothes and shoes

Kitty McDonough, 67, is a Brooklyn-born novelist who moved to Gowanus in 1992. She recounts the open atmospheric energy she grew accustomed to in the “industrial no man’s land” she knew as the sleepy provincial Gowanus.

“Cities change, and that’s particularly true about New York City, it’s constantly changing and inventing itself.”

McDonough loves the attention Arts Gowanus brings to local artists. The event introduces artists’ work to people who might otherwise not know of it. “It’s important to get people aware that this is happening here and it’s an artist community,” she says.

While she’s still getting used to the changes of the neighborhood, she welcomes the new energy people bring to the area. 

Work by Dale Williams

Dale Williams has been creating art in Gowanus since 1996. He became a part of the Open Studios in 1999 and helped organize the event the year after.

Williams paints hybrid figurative works from his imagination. His works evolve out of spontaneous feelings he has as he works, likening the experience to dreaming.

“You don’t plan your dreams, but afterward, you think about them—how they’re important to you, what they mean,” Dale says. “That’s what I’m always setting off towards in my work. I want to show myself something that feels like it has significance to me in that moment of making it, much like a dream might.”

Despite the lack of a fixed plan, Williams recognizes certain recurring themes in his work. “I definitely paint certain kinds of figures. I call them ‘strugglers and strivers.’

“They’re kind of involved in some sort of mysterious action and kind of emotional and you hope they get through it, whatever it is.”

A page of one of Dale Williams’ drawing books, showcasing works One Waiting and Sing Cuckoo Sing

Work by Dale Williams

Alitha Alford is a Black American Filipina artist whose work is inspired by her ancestry and family. She remembers confiding in her grandpa that she had always been a late bloomer, and in response, he said, “Leelee it doesn’t matter if you’re a late or early bloomer, all it matters is that you bloom.” 

She painted her grandpa with a flower, as an ode to that advice.

Alford initially held back from pursuing being a full-time artist because of the stigma that art can’t support you. Eventually, she chose to chase her dreams anyways. 

“Art is literally my heartbeat,” she says. “It feeds my soul.”

Work by Alitha Alford

Scott Albrecht standing in front of works from artists that have inspired him. Pictured is also a skateboard and a Korean Scotch Whisky box he designed.

Scott Albrecht is an abstract artist with a love for writing. He noticed people reading without connecting to words on a page and wanted to use his background in graphic design to turn his love of writing into a visual work that allows viewers to engage with words in a different way. 

“You can still find the letter forms, you can still look for the message, but the fact that it’s abstracted, reading becomes secondary to the experience,” he says.

Albrecht is currently working on an exhibit entitled What Holds Us that showcases works started after he sustained a severe head injury last year. He says the project branched out of his feeling of gratitude for all the love he received from those around him during his recovery. One of his works, Hold a Moment, centers around the power of telling people you love them and its influence on strengthening that moment.    

Albrecht ends the excerpt of this piece with, “At the time I was reconciling a level of fear from almost not having the opportunity to express that feeling because of the severity of the injury, and I wanted to take the opportunities when I could, telling people they were important to me was nurturing.”

Filed Under: Community, The Arts

The Privilege of Choice: Public Schools in New York City

October 11, 2022 By Kathryn Krase Filed Under: Community

If you haven’t seen the news, the New York City council approved a budget that drastically slashed public schools funds for the 2022-2023 school year. Mayor Adams claims the cuts were necessary due to declining enrollment in the system. But, those of us with vested interest in these schools know the budget has never been adequate. Teachers and parents are suing to force a restoration of funds. The Council and our Comptroller are trying to find other ways to get the money back to our schools. In the meantime, parents continue to make choices to ensure their children have access to the best public education possible. Everybody wants the best education for their child. But, the best isn’t always a choice to be made. Sometimes it’s luck. Sometimes it’s more than luck. And sometimes, the best options just aren’t even made available to you. 

My son hit the lottery when he was three. Well, in a way. My wonderful and absolutely perfect three year old son, Jack, was one of 18 children selected, at random, to become a student in a full day, pre-kindergarten classroom at Brooklyn New School (“BNS”, aka PS 146) for the Fall of 2011. I was excited for so many reasons: 1) We could save a year’s worth of preschool tuition (cha-ching); 2) Jack would be attending the same school as two, soon to be three, of his cousins (multiplying drop-off and pick up options for a busy working mom); and, 3) I absolutely adored the open classroom, project based learning, diversity-focused, curriculum BNS touted. Twelve years ago this fall, Jack entered the New York City public school system that I, too, am a product of. However, my educational selections were designed around privilege, rather than luck.

Having graduated from the “penthouse” program at PS 107, then MS (formerly “JHS”) 51, and Midwood High School (at Brooklyn College) I’m not just a product of the NYC public schools; I am the product of the elite inner sanctum of NYC Board of Education offerings. I was an academically inclined student with no behavioral issues. I didn’t read books, I absorbed them. I haven’t taken a standardized test I couldn’t perform very well on. As a result, I was funneled into programs that provided me unique access to “enrichment” programs in math, science, art and music that could easily match, if not surpass, the suburban offerings of Long Island and Westchester. But, let’s be honest: these programs were largely reserved for upper middle class White kids, like myself. 

The special offerings I was afforded in my experience as a NYC public school student were not available to every student who had academic abilities similar to mine. These special offerings were systematically designed to keep kids like me, from upper middle White class families like mine, in the public school system, especially after the “White Flight” out of New York City of similar families throughout the 1950s, 1960s and 1970s. The City needs a significant base of willing taxpayers in order to fund the largest public education system in the country. In response to dwindling enrollment into public schools, especially from certain neighborhoods, the “Board of Ed” designed programs, like the ones I attended, and other “magnet” and “gifted and talented” programs to satisfy savvy educational consumers, who demanded choices. 

The amazing educational opportunities I was provided weren’t about luck. The system was rigged in my favor. And, nearly 40 years later, the system is still rigged for kids, like mine, though many of us try so hard to believe it’s not. We somehow think our kids “earn” the better opportunities they are afforded. If we extend that logic to the rest of the families in NYC who aren’t receiving these opportunities, are we saying those kids don’t “deserve” higher quality opportunities… because they didn’t “earn” it?

To explore the concept of kids “earning” great educational opportunities, take a gander at any social media platform parents’ discussion of NYC middle school or high school admissions, especially the day AFTER assignments are made in the spring. You’ll see streams of parents proudly announcing their child’s placement. For instance, they will be celebrating how their child’s “achievement” on a standardized test secured them a spot in a Specialized High School. A few years ago, some of those same parents likely opted their kids out of similar state exams, challenging their validity. But, once the test validates their child’s intelligence, it’s a different story. Other parents will tout how their child, identified for their extraordinary talent in music and/or art, will now walk the same high school halls as Oscar and Grammy winners. They, likely, won’t tout how much they spent on music lessons, arts camps, and portfolio/audition prep, though. 

In those same feeds, on the same days, you’ll also see parents bemoaning disappointing admissions outcomes. Since there aren’t enough seats in the elite inner sanctum for everyone who wants one, some 10- 14 year olds who “worked so hard” won’t actually get the limited opportunity their parents are convinced they “deserve”. As a result, these parents often take last minute spots in the whitest charter programs they can find, or dip into college savings to fund private or religious school tuition. You’ll see comments that suggest these parents don’t believe there are acceptable options for their children amongst the other 500+ public high schools they didn’t put on their preference list that maxes out at a total of 12. Some parents admit they put fewer than 12 high school choices on their list… Those 500+ other offerings, however, are all that many of the 200,000+ NYC public high school kids, who are largely Black and Latinx, have available to them, because the system is not fair or equitable. Not everyone has a choice.

Public schools in rich, largely White, neighborhoods, like Park Slope, are highly sought after. So much so, that people hire consultants to help them figure out where to rent or purchase a home so that they’re “zoned” for the best kindergarten program in the District. These schools are “great”, by comparison, to other districts because rich, largely White, parents contribute significantly to PTA fundraisers in their kids’ schools. As a result, our schools have more teachers and more services. Our kids get special programming in the arts and sciences. Our kids have arts teachers and/or partnerships with cultural institutions, as if these are standard expectations in NYC public schools; they’re not. For instance, in 2014 ⅕ of NYC public schools didn’t have a full-time or part-time art teacher. Half of these schools were in the South Bronx and Central Brooklyn, with the highest proportion of Black or Latinx students. That’s not bad luck; it’s injustice.

In a system with limited resources (like the underfunded NYC public school system), if some kids get more, it means other kids get less; it’s economics. Having come to this realization over time, I am uncomfortable with the fact that the opportunities I was able to take advantage of as a child in NYC public schools were not made available to everyone. It’s particularly hard to swallow because I know, now, that even if I didn’t get all the “extras” I experienced, I would have, likely, been just as successful in life. It’s not fair that I got more than other students, who needed so much more than I did. So, I committed myself, as a parent, to not playing into the system. But, I’m not sure how effective my efforts have been. 

Instead of playing the District 15 address game, we took our chances and played the pre-k lottery for BNS… and “won”. But, I wasn’t the only upper middle class White parent to play this game of chance. In fact, upper middle class, mostly White parents, are the most adept at playing these “games”. As a result, BNS, though committed to racial and economic diversity from conception, was Whiter for most of Jack’s seven wonderful years in the Henry Street building than in any of the previous 30 years of its existence. Recognizing this concerning dynamic, BNS committed early to the NYC “Diversity in Admissions” (DIA) program, holding ⅓ of lottery spots for children from families who are eligible for free or reduced-price lunch. As a result of their DIA participation, five years after Jack graduated, BNS now boasts nearly 60% BIPOC students. If Jack were to enter the BNS pre-k lottery again this year, chances are he wouldn’t be so lucky this time around. That would suck. But, the reality is that no matter where Jack ended up for pre-k through fifth grade, he’d be fine.

When Jack was in 5th grade, we chose to support the early efforts of District 15 to integrate their middle schools through the removal of academic and attendance screens. On Jack’s middle school application preference list, our top three schools all used lotteries for admission. We didn’t even put MS 51 on Jack’s list of 8 options. Jack got his second choice, MS442. But, we were never disappointed. 

Then came high school admissions. Confident that Jack would succeed academically wherever he landed, it was most important that his high school would be able to engage him extracurricularly. He didn’t bother to take the SHSAT. With the exception of one program on his list (NYC iSchool), we only considered schools that had boys volleyball programs. We listed 12 schools on Jack’s high school application list. The first 3, and 8 of the total list of 12, were “lottery” schools. The 4th and 5th were Midwood programs (#goHornets). He didn’t get into Essex Street Academy (#1) or Harvest Collegiate (#2). He was placed in Park Slope Collegiate (#3). Walking distance from home, and with the best volleyball coaches ever, we were thrilled. Jack had a wonderful 9th grade experience at PSC, and he’s soooo ready to go back to school this fall. 

Changes in the NYC public high school admissions process and resulting decisions created an uproar this past spring. The COVID pandemic destabilized the metrics previously used to evaluate student admission to academically “screened” high schools. Attendance during the COVID year(s) couldn’t be used, and standardized test grades from 7th grade weren’t available, either. High schools that wanted to “screen” their admissions were forced to rely on categories that grouped students by grades. With the statistical impossibility of discerning the relative worth of one kid with a 95 average from the thousands of other such kids, many “selective” high schools were forced to use lotteries in their admissions process for the first time. And guess what? This time the lotteries benefitted Black and Latinx kids!! NOT THE WHITE KIDS!! For instance, this past spring, 43% of offers at Park Slope’s own Millennium Brooklyn went to Black and Latinx students, an increase from 20% the year before. But, due to the scarcity of valued spots in the system, if BIPOC kids are benefitting from the change, this means that White kids are “losing out”. And White kids are more likely than others to leave the public school system as a result of not getting what they want. Why? Because they’re more likely to have other choices…

Over the coming school year, individual schools will need to make tough choices in the face of budget cuts. Individual teachers will need to make tough choices about how to spend their limited resources on classroom supplies in the face of record inflation. Individual families will, also, need to make tough choices about where to send their kids when they don’t get into their top pick for middle school or high school. If you’re one of these families, choose wisely, but please, acknowledge your choice is a privilege.

Filed Under: Community

Over 100 Million Rides

September 27, 2022 By Jonathan Zelinger Filed Under: Community, Park Slope Life

Ten years of Citibike

The summer of 2014. I was seventeen, and visiting
my brother for the first time in his unfamiliar new
life at the bottom tip of Manhattan. He had just
turned 23 and, like me, hadn’t spent much time in
New York until now. Determined to orient himself in
the city before starting his new job, he wanted to cover as much ground as possible that weekend. Earlier that summer, his brand-new foldable Brompton bicycle – a graduation gift from my mother – had been lock-smashed and swiped from his front porch in Boston.

That weekend visit was the first time I remember using a Citi Bike. I inserted my People’s Bank debit card in the large blocky kiosk and quietly swallowed a lump in my throat after agreeing to the $200 dollar hold on my card in case of loss or damages. Still, I felt honored to be exploring my brother’s new home and tried my best to keep up. And for a while, I did. But I have vague recollections of struggling behind him, seeing him get smaller and smaller beneath the landscape of the Manhattan Bridge. Winded and slow.

This upcoming May, depending on how you feel, you’ll either be celebrating or denouncing the 10 year anniversary of Citi Bike’s arrival to New York City. In that time the bike share program has recorded over 100 million rides and expanded the original 6,000 bike fleet into 25,000 bikes, many of which are electric. With over 90,000 rides per day and docks in every borough but Staten Island, Citi Bike is a New York City fixture. Like most fixtures, its development and presence are contentious — not appreciated by all, or even a majority. Over the last ten years, New Yorkers have gathered together to both fight and to insist upon its expansion. New Yorkers have died on Citi Bikes. They’ve relied on them for their commutes. They have grown to love riding, or conversely, have been repelled. As we head into the second decade of Citi Bike, I set out to understand where we’ve been on these bikes, and where we’re pedaling towards next.

Four years after that first Citi Bike ride, I moved to New York myself. In my third week in the city, my bike got stolen too. I watched security footage of a middle-aged man and a mini chainsaw. The grainy play-by-play showed him whipping out the electric blade from his backpack and cutting my scrawny lock within seconds. “A rite of passage,” the security guard at the front desk of my work building said, “It happens to everyone at some point.” I’ve been granted the rite twice since. And while I still own a bike in the city, I am no longer willing to lock it up. “That’s definitely one of the reasons

I’m contemplating a Citi Bike Membership”, said Thomas Gerity, a resident of Bed Stuy. “I generally wasn’t worried about locking up my bike when I first moved here but I poked the beast, so to say. And I lost”

In the wake of the pandemic, Citi Bike memberships are more popular than ever. Cooped up New Yorkers gravitated towards bike riding as streets emptied and concerns for safety surged. Everyone had their reasons; a safer way to commute or to exercise, an urge to leave the neighborhood. Whatever the reason, the desire to ride a bike spread, and a global bike shortage quickly followed suit. It’s been a perfect storm for Citi Bike; increased demand and a lack of supply.

With more riders in the city, on Citi Bikes or personally owned bikes, the future of cycling in New York will only be as viable as the infrastructure built for it. Former Mayor Bill DeBlasio was seen as a fervent proponent of expanding riding infrastructure. In his seven years as Mayor, he shepherded the implementation of over 1000 miles of bike lane across all five burrows. More recently, current Mayor Eric Adams announced an “historic 900 million five year traffic safety plan” last April. The plan, which is a continuation of Deblasio’s “NYC Streets Plan,” promises New Yorker’s 250 more miles of protected bike lanes within five years. “When I first started biking in the city, in the summer of 2020, I was surprised by the amount of bike lanes and general safety I experienced,” said Gerity. “It’s not a city made for biking, but it feels like it’s made a lot of steps to really accommodate them.”

Statistics provided by the Department of Transportation reflect Gerity’s sense for the improved infrastructure. In 2020 alone, 546 miles of protected bike lanes were installed. The question however, is whether this continued expansion can keep up with the 116% increase in daily cycling around New York since 2010. And while most of the country experienced a spike in car ownership during the pandemic, New York’s rate among single family households decreased. Instead, time and energy were spent on expanding bus lanes, bike lanes, and building Citi Bike stations.

In my first weeks in New York, I was biking over the Brooklyn Bridge to downtown Brooklyn every morning. Without fail, this was the most stressful part of my day. Veteran commuters, fueled by entitlement, were prone to lash out at blissfully unaware tourists that stepped in and out of the bike lane. At times, it felt like the least welcoming spot to visitors anywhere in the five boroughs. The one upside of having my bike stolen that first month was no longer having to endure that mile-long stretch. The forthcoming ten year anniversary of Citi Bike seems to mark the end of a chapter. A stage characterized by expansion, controversy, growing pains, and technological advancement. It’s a new dawn for Citi Bike.The streets are changing. People are ready to ride. And if you find yourself on the Brooklyn Bridge, you’ll notice the bike lane is now separate from the pedestrian path. And tensions are lower.

Filed Under: Community, Park Slope Life

Dog Fight

February 1, 2022 By Kara Goldfarb Filed Under: Community, Park Slope Life Tagged With: dogs, Park Slope, Prospect Park

Advocating for a Dog Park in Prospect Park: The Start of a Journey 

Why doesn’t Prospect Park have an off-leash dog run? And how do we get one? Let’s find out. 

Though all the ways— both big and small— in which COVID changed the flow of life can hardly be quantified, one category with some concrete data revolves around pet adoptions. The Animal Care Centers of NYC shared that about 25 percent of people who had taken in dogs to foster at the start of the pandemic had adopted them permanently by June 2020. In May of 2021, a nationally representative poll of over 5,000 respondents by the ASPCA revealed that since the start of the pandemic, close to one in five households acquired a dog or cat. Based on the 2019 U.S Census, that would account for around 23 million households— with between 85-90 percent of those households reporting that they weren’t considering rehoming their pets. 

Another quantifiable change in lifestyle: as of November, only 28 percent of Manhattan office workers had returned to their desks. While we can’t predict how and when that number will change, there is an undeniableness in the ubiquitous embracement of more flexible hours and remote work. 

So what do these two things have in common? Well, with more dog owners and fewer in-office hours, it begs the question: Are there enough places where their pets are able to roam free? In some areas, yes. The Kensington Dog Run, which allows dogs to roam off-leash, opened in July 2020. The 7,000 square feet fenced-in space in the Parade Ground along Coney Island Avenue has separated areas for large and small dogs and canine-friendly turf. Though smaller in size, Jemmy’s Dog Run (currently undergoing renovations) in Madison Square Park, located near 5th Avenue and 24th street in Manhattan, is a year-round dog run with double-entry and exit gates, a ground of smooth pebbles, plenty of trees for shades, and lined with spigots to keep dogs hydrated. 

One park glaringly absent of this kind of area reserved for off-leash recreation is the hub of Prospect Park itself. And the question posed by the publisher of the PSR was: Why? The 586-acre park is surrounded by families with dogs. Yet the off-leash rules are surprisingly rigid. In the designated areas for dogs, dogs are only permitted to run free between 6am–9am, and then from 9pm–1am. Particularly in the winter, when daylight hours dwindle, the opportunity for people in the neighborhood to give their dogs off-leash exercise throughout the course of the day is a difficult task. Why exactly is this the case? Or perhaps, to jump ahead, a better question would be: How does a community— like other communities around NYC have done in the past— go about establishing a fair and proper dog park. 

That’s the mission we’ll be starting with this article series. Namely, the steps that have to be taken, the people and groups who are part of the process, the money involved, and the time scale for which a project like this needs to come to fruition. Talking to advocates and officials, digging into data, and examining past precedents along the way. 

As per the American Kennel Club, the initial stages involve creating a proposal that contains the goals, proposes location, funding, maintenance, and enforcement. According to The Bark, an award-winning publication that was started in 1997 after the two founders adopted a dog and discovered it was illegal for her to go unleashed at their local park, a task force is helpful in centralizing the process, while conducting open, public meetings.

Demonstrating need and support are vital as well. With valid statistics on dog owners, the community, and park-goers, a worded request, as well as a circulating petition, are strong documents that can be brought to the attention of local officials in a concise way, which could lead to the request for a hearing. Ultimately, patience seems to be a key component throughout. As anyone who has advocated and fought for something before knows, the combination of various opinions with the nuances of bureaucracies and the process of congealing support into a cohesive unit can feel time-consuming. It can feel frustrating.  Futile, even, at times. But something worth championing doesn’t always come easy. And hopefully the people and groups we talk with along the way will help in streamlining the major things that need to be done. 

“The new Kensington Dog Run is a testament to what our community can achieve when it comes together over a shared interest, like providing a space for our canine companions to enjoy,” Borough President (now mayor-elect) Eric Adams said in the press release when the dog run opened. He also added, “Amid an unimaginably difficult period for our city, it’s a small — but powerful — reminder that empowering communities at the grassroots level can deliver results.”

“The new Kensington Dog Run is a testament to what our community can achieve when it comes together over a shared interest, like providing a space for our canine companions to enjoy. I was so proud to work with my colleagues in government and the local community to help fund this project through the participatory budgeting process. Amid an unimaginably difficult period for our city, it’s a small — but powerful — reminder that empowering communities at the grassroots level can deliver results,” said Brooklyn Borough President Eric Adams.

Stay tuned as we continue to dig down, and “bone” up on this topic. Hopefully in the end every dog will have its day. 

Filed Under: Community, Park Slope Life Tagged With: dogs, Park Slope, Prospect Park

My Part of the Equation

January 20, 2022 By Laura Broadwell Filed Under: Community Tagged With: adoption

When I adopted my daughter from China in 1999 – and brought her home to live in Brooklyn – I was unaware of my racial privilege. Now, I see things differently.

A version of this essay originally appeared on the Holt International website.

On the morning of July 7, 1999 – a day of lucky 7s – my life changed. After many months of waiting and nail-biting anticipation, I received a package in the mail containing my daughter’s referral photo. Before I knew it, I was one step closer to becoming a mother. Du Xue Jing – as she was then named – was 7 months old at the time, but her little moon-shaped face, wise eyes and pouty lips already suggested that she and I would be great friends, a dynamic single-mother-and-daughter duo. At the age of 42, I felt humbled by the confidence instilled in me by adoption officials on two continents and blessed to be given this opportunity to become a mother. 

Within weeks of receiving my referral, I was off to central China to adopt my baby daughter. I decided to name her Eleni, in honor of my mother, born in Greece; and I kept Xue Jing as Eleni’s middle name, in tribute to her birth country. I hoped the significance of both names – Eleni Xue Jing – would link my child to her present and to her past and reflect the breadth of our tri-continental, interracial family. Engulfed by love for my daughter (not to mention new-mother fatigue), I looked past our physical differences and never dreamed of a day when the disparity in our races would be of concern. 

In 1999, U.S. families adopted more than 4,100 children from China, and as I walked around Park Slope that summer, I was certain that many of those families had landed near me. Day after day, as I pushed Eleni’s stroller down 8th Avenue or up toward the park, I’d pass other white parents with small children from Asia. As we crossed paths, we’d nod at one another, smile in recognition and often stop abruptly to have a conversation. “How long did it take you to adopt?” we would ask. “Is your child sleeping through the night?” “Have you found a good pediatrician?” “Do you want to get together for a playdate?” Suddenly, I had a built-in community.

That’s not to say that Eleni and I didn’t venture out to other parts of the city. On some days, we’d stroll over to my favorite Korean green grocer to buy fresh fruits and vegetables. I laughed when this man, whose store I’d shopped at for years, took one look at Eleni and smiled at me for the first time – ever. On other days, we’d take the subway to Chinatown, where waiters circled our table in restaurants, giving Eleni the star treatment while presenting her with kid-friendly chopsticks. As Eleni grew older, she and I ate traditional moon cakes at Autumn Moon festivals. We bundled up in the cold to watch dancing dragons wind their way down frenetic streets in Chinatown during Lunar New Year celebrations. We traveled mostly in white circles but lived in New York, a racially diverse, multi-ethnic city. The question of race – and what my daughter might experience – didn’t really cross my mind then. As one of many interracial families in our city, why would it?

In retrospect, my perceptions and expectations were perhaps naïve. In her early years, Eleni attended schools and played on Brooklyn sports teams that were largely white but that had kids of all races, including Asian. For the most part, we were insulated as a family from the kinds of comments – and racial slurs – that we might have endured had we lived in a less-diverse environment. Still, there were the off-handed remarks and gestures made by children on the playground about the shape of Eleni’s eyes. There was the Asian boy in middle school who referred to me as a “bad Asian mom” because I failed to prepare rice for Lunar New Year one winter. (“My mom’s white,” Eleni shot back, hoping to correct him once and for all.) When Eleni traveled to outlying white suburbs to play with her soccer team, parents on the sidelines would sometimes refer to her by her ethnicity during a game. “Watch out for that Chinese girl!” a dad would say as Eleni was closing in on the ball, about to make a play. She listened as friends told her they considered her white “just like us,” or better yet, that she was an Oreo, “yellow on the outside, white on the inside.”

But it wasn’t until Eleni was in high school that I began to see my race as part of the equation. One day Eleni came home from school talking about an article she had read called “White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack,” by Peggy McIntosh. Not quite understanding how my race afforded me privilege, I read the piece myself and was struck by the notion of how seldom I thought about my whiteness. For the first time, I considered these questions: Did being white hamper my ability to move freely through the day – my world – without fear or repercussion? Was I often made to feel “othered,” even though I grew up in a multi-generational family of non-native-English speakers? Was my race a liability – or used against me routinely – in any way? Was I viewed as a perpetual foreigner, or (just as insultingly) a model minority? Was I ever confused with another white person who resembled me vaguely, or told that all white people look alike? In most cases, the answer was no. 

At the age of 23, however, my daughter has had a different experience in the world. For four years, Eleni attended a predominantly white liberal arts college, known for its small class size and low professor-to-student ratio. Yet on occasion, a professor would transpose Eleni’s identity with that of another Asian student, calling each by the other’s name, even though they looked nothing alike. (This didn’t occur among white students, incidentally.)

During a semester abroad in Europe, Eleni was sometimes catcalled by men who used the native word for Chinese, or who spoke to her in a mock Chinese dialect. In America, Eleni has been asked questions – by the security guard at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, an Uber driver and others – that imply that she is a perpetual foreigner: “Where are you from? Have long have you lived here?” “Where is your family from? Will you be spending the holidays with ‘your people’?”

Sometimes the questions are meant to be “conversational,” such as when a car service driver near her former college asked – and then proclaimed, “Did you go home for Christmas? It must have been nice to speak your native language and eat the food of your people.” But sometimes being viewed as a “foreigner” has had more serious repercussions.

Earlier this year, when Covid-19 was rampant in New York, Asian people – much like my daughter – were screamed at to “Go home!” and blamed for the spread of the coronavirus. Elderly Asians and even some younger ones were brutally attacked while minding their own business on the street or doing a simple errand. The news in the press and on social media was shocking, disturbing, devastating, and it took a toll on my daughter. Eleni suddenly felt scared to run in Prospect Park, a place she’s frequented since childhood. She refused to ride the subway alone, as she had since she was a preteen. She became anxious to leave our home. 

One night when the news was particularly awful, Eleni wanted to talk about it. Feeling weary of the never-ending grip of Covid and its restrictions, the general uptick in crime in our city and the horrible attacks on Asians throughout the country, all I could muster was a simple, “I’m so tired, Eleni. Can we talk about this tomorrow?” My daughter looked at me curiously and responded, “You’re tired, Mom? Think about how I feel.” And there it was – another moment that made me pause. Sure, I was having my own bouts of fatigue and anxiety. Yes, I had my own widespread concerns. But the truth was that none of them were connected to my race, my whiteness. Due to no virtue or valor of my own, due only to my privilege, I could walk down the street freely (masked up and socially distanced), go for a walk in the park, run an errand, meet a friend, all without fear of retribution. The same could not be said for Eleni. 

Later that evening, I sat in the dark with my daughter, hoping to comfort her before bed. I thought about the ways in which I could protect her, much as I did when she was a baby, nestled safely in my front pack. I thought about how I could shake up the world and make it better behave. I thought about my love for my daughter, and how helpless I felt then and there. So I did what I’ve done so many times as a mother, in both good times and bad. I put my hand gently on Eleni’s back and told her we’d talk more in the morning. In that moment, in silence, it was the least – and best – I could do. 

Tagline: A version of this story first appeared on the Holt International website (holtinternational.org) in November 2021. Holt International is a non-profit organization that helps strengthen families at risk of separation, provides care and support to orphaned and vulnerable children, and unites children and families through adoption. 

Filed Under: Community Tagged With: adoption

Cars in Brooklyn are About Family

January 11, 2022 By Kathryn Krase Filed Under: Community, Park Slope Life

During my many rants on the Park Slope Together Facebook Group Page, I often challenge neighbors whose expressed interests in a safer community are ignorant to the fact that private automobile ownership provides safest transportation, especially during the COVID19 pandemic, to many of our most respected neighbors: older adults. I wasn’t talking about my own needs; I barely consider my 46-year old self a grown-up, let alone the appropriately titled “middle-aged”. I reflect, instead, the importance of having a car in supporting the productive and long lives my grandparents (and now, parents) enjoyed in Brooklyn. 

While others, usually newer to Brooklyn than me and my family, seem to connect urban car use with disdain, the thought of cars in Brooklyn is more than nostalgia for me; cars are about family. My relationship to one of the closest people in the first 33 years of my life was built, largely, through car rides in and around Brooklyn. That person was my smart and complicated maternal grandfather, Anthony Charles “Nicky” Nicoletti (1912-2008).

If you had the pleasure to know my grandfather, you probably called him “Nicky”, “Nick”, “Big Daddy Nick”, or “Mo” (go figure). My sisters and I always called him “Nicky”. Though he had 10 grandchildren and 17 great-children when he died, “Grandpa” was never a term he accepted as endearment, due to his vanity. As little kids, if you wanted to get a rise out of Nicky, you would call him “Grandpa”, and run away laughing as he chased you around the dining room table with hands outstretched pretending a wicked fate would meet you, but giving tickles, when he caught you.

Nicky was born in Brooklyn, the son of Italian immigrants, Sabato Nicoletti and Anna Gregorio. He was the second of three sons. He was smart, quick-witted, and prideful. Similar to most of his first-generation peers, he didn’t attend college. But he boasted about graduating from Erasmus Hall (picture), a competitive public high school in his day, and would reminisce about his academic achievements: “Did you ever get 104 on a test?”, he would ask. “Well, I did…”, he’d continue after your answer, with a wink and a smile.

He was proud of being a retired officer of the New York Police Department (picture). At the time of his service, there were strict standards, largely set by Irish-Catholic leadership, and clearly designed to keep Italian-Americans off the force. One of these rules was a minimum height requirement. This rule, and many others, invalidated the applications of many (shorter) Italian-Americans of Nicky’s time, and then Puerto Rican and Black applicants through the early 1970’s. Since Nicky was strikingly tall for his generation, and a good test-taker (as evidenced by his achievements at Erasmus), his eligibility for entry into the NYPD was hard to ignore (and having a political boss as a father-in-law didn’t hurt, either).

By the time I was born in 1975, Nicky (then, 63 years old) was long retired from the NYPD, but still had many forms of employment, paid and unpaid. He and my grandmother, (Nana) Rose, owned a two-story, one-family, house on the corner of Maple Street and New York Avenue, in what was then called “Flatbush”, and now borders on Prospect Lefferts Garden. That three-bedroom, 1.5 bath home, with finished basement, had not just one, but FOUR garages. 

They rented 3 of the garages on a monthly basis and retained one to facilitate one of Nicky’s side-businesses, car repair. He wasn’t a “mechanic”, but he could fix almost anything before cars relied on computers to function. The finished basement was once a great hang out for my mother and her brothers, with wood paneled walls, and a built-in stereo system. But, in my lifetime, it served as Nicky’s shop where he repaired tube televisions and radios, amongst other electronics and mechanical items. But, the garage was where he worked on cars; his car, his family’s cars, his friends’ cars, his neighbors’ cars, etc.

Nicky never drove fancy cars, or the big cars that many Italian-American men of his generation are often associated with, like Lincoln Continentals or Cadillacs. My sisters remember his Mercury sedan. In my lifetime, the car that I have the fondest memories of was his Datsun, 4-door, hatchback. That car was my favorite for one special reason: with a lot of help from Nicky, that car taught me how to drive a standard transmission, even when my feet didn’t reach the clutch.

Back in the days when children weren’t relegated to the back seat for fear of death in car crashes, I loved being Nicky’s co-pilot, cementing myself in the passenger seat whenever I could. This was a feat, since as the youngest of three girls I was not entitled to that position when my older sisters were anywhere near the car. When the three of us were in the car with Nicky, it was a competition between Kristin and Karen for the honor. Jousting for seats happened often in Nicky’s car because Nicky drove us ALL over Brooklyn, but mostly shuttling us from our house to his house, and back. 

For the first 9 years of my life, we lived just a half a mile away from Nana and Nicky on Midwood Street near Flatbush Avenue in Prospect Lefferts Garden (PLG), but we rarely walked the distance; we didn’t have to. Nicky was retired, and he had guaranteed parking when he got home: my current Brooklyn dream! Many weekend mornings our phone would ring, but none of us would pick it up. It rang twice, and then fell silent. The signal was received. Nana was letting us know that Nicky was en route to pick us up. Our dog, Kwincy, recognizing the sound of Nicky’s car engine, would start barking long before we could see him pull up in front of the house. We’d get on our shoes and coats and head out the door. After jockeying for position, with me moping and resigned in the back seat, he’d drive us to his house, where Nana would be preparing us breakfast, and/or lunch, and definitely dessert. LOTS of dessert.

On Sundays, my parents would join us after the weekly WPIX showing of an Abbott & Costello movie, and we’d have an early dinner/late lunch. When these family Sundays coincided with an afternoon game for the NY Jets or Giants, that meant Nana would make her signature fried chicken, and macaroni salad, served with Pillsbury Crescent Rolls, and we’d all eat in the living room, the girls on the floor, by the console tv. 

When we moved a few more miles away to Park Slope in the mid-80’s, we still kept up this routine, though more often than not, I was the only passenger. My sisters, then teenagers, had busier lives than I did on the weekends. Instead of a trip of 2 simple right turns connecting Nana & Nicky’s house to ours, the trip between PLG and Park Slope often involved driving through Prospect Park, from the 3rd Street entrance around to Lincoln Rd, and back. Access to the park by motor vehicles was first limited in the late 1960s with “car-free” weekends. By the 1990s, car traffic in Prospect Park was limited to weekday “rush hours”, and then eventually banning car traffic all together in 2018. Every time I cross West Drive to coach my baseball team, I think fondly about my rides with Nicky through the park, knowing that on the other side there was good food and family waiting for me.

When it was just Nicky and me in the car, and my position as co-pilot was secured, he would share his musings about the mechanical nature of cars. If I was ever to be a decent driver, as most women weren’t in his eye, I needed to know how a transmission worked. He had a disdain for automatic transmissions. Anybody could drive them (“even women”, was implied). Automatic transmissions took the skill out of driving. “Who wants to drive a car, but not know how it works?” 

My grandmother never learned to drive a car, but arguably, she didn’t have to. Nana was Nicky’s perennial passenger for 72 years of marriage. Every weekday, they ventured out into Brooklyn together in their car. Nicky at the wheel; Nana to his right. He would wait patiently in the car, reading his Daily News, and listening to 770AM, while Nana would get her hair colored and styled, later in life at Helen’s Beauty Salon on Coney Island Avenue and Cortelyou. They went to Landi’s meat market in Mill Basin for sausage. They went to the Sabrett’s outlet on Ralph Avenue for hotdogs. And, then the desserts: Ebingers in Flatbush for the original Brooklyn Blackout Cake, Leske’s Bakery in Bay Ridge for apple cake, Court Street Pastry for “dots”, and Lords Bakery at the “Junction” for Black and White cookies and seven layer cake. While Nicky never taught Nana the “ways of a standard transmission”, her lack of education in the area might have been by her choosing. Their relationship was challenging, to say the least. But, car rides in and around Brooklyn were central to their long, fruitful, if not perfect, marriage.

Thanks to Nicky, all three Krase girls, now women, proudly know how to drive a car with a standard transmission. My sisters remember the days of sitting in the front of Nicky’s Mercury sedan, but not in the front seat, exactly. They remember straddling the “bump” between the driver and passenger side seats. While driving, Nicky would direct them to shift the car into a particular gear, while he depressed the clutch. “First”. “Second”. “Third”. Even “neutral”. For me, similar memories are in his Datsun. My favorite times were when Nicky would depress the clutch and ask “which gear?”. When I made the right choice, to up-shift, or down-shift, depending on the traffic and the situation, he was pleased as punch, and so was I. It felt good to receive Nicky’s validation; such was not so easily achieved for most people. 

Besides driving me to and from his house on the weekends, Nicky also picked me up from school to drive me to appointments. Weekly allergy shots in Sheepshead Bay. Monthly orthodontist visits in the Williamsburg Savings Bank building (now luxury condos across from the Brooklyn Apple Store and the new LIRR station). Choir practice at St. Francis Xavier. And of course, sports… Tennis lessons at Parade Grounds. Swimming practice at Brooklyn College. By the time I was in high school, multiple hours a week with Nicky in his car were an accepted part of my schedule; how else would I do everything that I did?

When I was a two-varsity sport student-athlete at Midwood High School at Brooklyn College from 1989-1993, Nicky and Nana Rose were in their late-70’s/early 80’s living in Park Slope, in the third-floor apartment of my parents’ Brownstone on 9th Street. Sports were just as important to Nicky as his cars, and he hardly missed any of my games, home or away. He would drive around Brooklyn, Queens, even the Bronx, to watch me and my teammates play volleyball in the fall, or tennis in the spring. 

While the volleyball team would travel to matches together on a bus, Nicky would meet us there, often with one or both of my parents in tow, to watch us play, and then drive me home. During NYC Public School Athletic League (PSAL) playoffs and the Mayor’s Cup tournament at the end of the tennis season in the spring, Nicky would transport 4 players (including me) from Midwood’s celebrated girls’ tennis team to the USTA Center at Flushing Meadows Corona Park to watch us in action. Nicky’s dedication to our tennis team, in particular, earned him a special award upon my graduation (picture).

Some of our greatest days together in the car were on our way home in celebration of doubles tournament wins with friend, and Park Slope neighbor, Olana Hirsch (Khan). But, there was that one time, in 1993, when Olana and I lost a match that we should have won in the finals of the PSAL tournament, and Nicky was our ride back to Park Slope. After the disappointing loss, Nicky was not waiting courtside to console us. Instead, he met us at the car, without saying a word. He, literally, did not utter a word to either of us, the entire ride home. I think it was days before he spoke to me again, and we lived in the same house. Winning our fourth consecutive Mayor’s Cup Tournament, just a few weeks later, helped ease the tension, but I’ll never forget that dismissal. Message received: achievement was celebrated; failure was not an option.

Nicky, himself, wasn’t perfect. He was complicated. Much like driving, and owning a car in Brooklyn. He often refused to wear a seatbelt, especially across his chest. The standard “3-point” seatbelt we rely on today was “new technology” in the late 1950’s. By then, Nicky had been driving for 20+ years, and wasn’t welcoming of change, especially if it was government mandated. He also had a special relationship with traffic lights. Green meant “go”; red meant “stop”; but yellow lights prompted Nicky to chant, “gonna make it, gonna make it”, as his foot came off the break, and sometimes lightly applied pressure to the gas.

By moving to Park Slope, Nicky gave up his repairman role, and almost all of his tools. And, while he lost his garages, he did NOT give up his car. He would still shuttle my grandmother for their daily shopping outings. He also added driving my mother to and from work at Brooklyn Hospital downtown on Dekalb Ave, or Caledonian Hospital on Parkside Ave. The man did not need Waze or Google Maps to tell him the best route or its alternatives. His entire lifetime on the roads of Brooklyn gave him all the direction he needed, coming from the depth of his soul. Though, if he saw the current state of rush hour traffic at Park (now P.O. Machate) Circle, by the Parade Grounds, he would be just as disgruntled as all other Brooklyn drivers.

As a result of his committed Brooklyn motorist role, most of his Park Slope days involved waiting for a parking spot. He was not one to circle the block, and find any spot he could a few blocks away from home. He would sit in his car, outside the house, waiting for a spot to open up. He would often stand by the car, chatting with neighbors and passersby. He would take these occasions as opportunity to clean his car, inside and out. It was, as a result, attractive and spotless, which undoubtedly prompted the many break-ins of his car. The stereo, for instance, was stolen on a few occasions; one such occasion my most valuable possession (a cassette soundtrack to “Beaches”) was taken along with the stereo. 

These days, street parking is even harder to come by than in Nicky’s day. When anyone tries to raise the concern on Park Slope Together, or similar neighborhood fora, some neighbors insist car owners should suffer for the privilege of their eco-scourge. But, I can’t help but think about how Nicky’s car helped he and Nana live the “buy-local” lifestyle that those same current neighbors claim to ascribe to, while simultaneously accepting Amazon packages at WholeFoods, and scheduling their FreshDirect orders for delivery during daytime hours, as they work from the comfort of their homes during a pandemic. 

Nicky gave up driving as he neared his 90th birthday (pictured with me at his party at the Montauk Club). He lived another six years relegated to the passenger seat in any car ride he would take at that point. We drove our cars to his funeral at Greenwood Cemetery, and regularly drive there to visit his and Nana Rose’s graves, and those of 10 other deceased family members. They can all be found near the intersection of Vale Avenue and Primrose Path, if you’d like to join us for a visit.

Cars continue to be an important and vital part of my family’s lives. Driving, now, gives my father an alternative to biking when he has to teach at Brooklyn College on cold and/or rainy days, and means my mother can regularly and easily connect with long-time Brooklyn-born friends who made the move to Staten or Long Island. They can independently continue their own grocery shopping, and while they don’t spend their days shopping for local delicacies in all corners of Brooklyn, they continue to use their car to follow the sporting careers of their five Brooklyn-born, bred, and blooming grandchildren all over NYC and beyond.

I do not apologize for having a two car family in Brooklyn. My husband uses his car to transport himself and his tools as a carpenter and essential worker, rehabilitating units long-neglected due to being owned and operated by the New York City Housing Authority. Me, I’ve used my car to reverse-commute to Northern New Jersey to teach at Ramapo College, oftentimes carpooling with other Park Slope friends. I’ll admit, I also have driven the two miles to the faculty and staff parking garage at LIU Brooklyn on Dekalb Ave, across from where Nicky would drop my mother off to work. And, while I’m not willing to wait hours for a spot outside my house, my husband has been known to do so. These days, my car spends more days parked than moving. But, the way I see it, I’ve got a good 40 more years of driving (and parking) in Brooklyn, G-d willing/inshallah. So, in the meantime, I guess I’ll continue to practice my social media rants. I think Nicky would approve.

Filed Under: Community, Park Slope Life

Life in Balance

September 28, 2021 By Laura Broadwell Filed Under: Books, Community, Park Slope Lit, Park Slope Reading, Reader Excerpt Tagged With: books, parenting, Park Slope

Excerpted from Tick Tock: Essays on Becoming a Parent After 40 edited by Vicki Breitbart and Nan Bauer-Maglin (Dottir Press, 2021

My daughter, Eleni, is twenty-one now, but I distinctly remember a day when she was two and I was desperately trying to convince her to put on her shoes so we could go out to play. Eleni was running around distractedly and wouldn’t listen, while my mother, then seventy-five, was repeatedly asking me unrelated questions—something about a neighbor and what we would like for dinner. As I answered my mother’s questions, she asked them again because she was hard of hearing. For what seemed to be an eternity, I found myself caught in a cycle of speaking louder and louder to a two-year-old who wouldn’t listen and to a seventy-five-year-old who couldn’t hear. To a bystander, the scene may have seemed comical, but I was not amused. 

In retrospect, that particular day was golden. The sun was shining, my father—also seventy-five—was out for a run, and my mother was still able to cook the foods of her native Greece. Though I was an exhausted, older single mother, I found immense joy in (eventually) taking my daughter out to play, and, as an only child, I reveled in the fact that my parents had finally been granted a grandchild. My family now felt whole and complete. 

In a few years’ time, things would change. 

“Ever since I was a child, I dreamed of becoming a mother; and as I crept toward forty and remained unmarried, this dream, this ambition, didn’t fade. Then when I was forty-one, a confluence of factors arose that made motherhood seem possible.”

Living in an unusually sizable apartment in Brooklyn, I had a steady job that I loved, supportive parents and friends who resided near my home, and a surprising ally in the Chinese government. Though things have changed since, there existed a window of time, a fortuitous opening, when the Chinese government allowed a single woman over forty to adopt a healthy infant—in most cases, a baby girl. (For me this was a bonus, since I intended to raise a child on my own.) On top of that, the adoption process in China was fairly straightforward; and with some luck, it appeared I could be in China within eighteen months, a new mother to a baby daughter. After much thought and reasonable trepidation, I decided to pursue this option. 

On August 16, 1999, I arrived at a dimly lit registrar’s office in central China, where I was handed an eight-month-old baby. At the age of forty-two, I suddenly became a first-time mother. I named my daughter Eleni in honor of my own mother, who had waited patiently for her first and only grandchild. Then nine days later, we flew home to New York, where my parents and friends greeted us at the airport. Eleni and I were set to begin our new life together. 

Our first two years in Brooklyn passed quickly. Eleni was a happy child, a curious child, a child who never slept. By extension, I was always exhausted, holding down a full-time job, caring for my daughter, having few spare moments to myself. But as an older mother, I viewed this juggling act and ever-present fatigue as a small price to pay for the joy of raising a child. As a parent over forty, I’d had countless years of “me time,” during which I could travel, see friends, build a career. So spending a Saturday afternoon with my parents and Eleni was more than enough to make me happy. Having my mother prepare Greek meals and bring them to our house, or seeing my dad play so energetically in the park with my daughter, fulfilled me. I was grateful for my job, grateful to reside in a neighborhood with other adoptive families and little girls from China, and grateful for the multicultural city in which I lived. By some divine stroke of luck, everything seemed in order. 

But as it happens, the best-laid plans often go awry. On September 11, 2001, when Eleni was almost three, the World Trade Center was hit by terrorists, bringing our city to its knees. Several weeks later, the magazine at which I’d worked for nearly a decade folded, citing a consistent loss of revenue. Then, in the spring of 2004, my seventy-nine-year-old father—the bedrock of our family, a man with boundless energy—was diagnosed with mesothelioma, a rare form of lung cancer. How supremely unfair it felt that a man who had valued his health and had so much to live for would be struck with such a fatal illness. Within six months of his diagnosis, my father died, leaving me with countless business affairs to look after, a broken heart, and a mother and daughter who were beyond bereaved. 

Eleni was five, almost six, when her grandpa died, so it was hard for her to comprehend how this vibrant man had left us. On the playground at school, Eleni would look up at the sky and see her grandfather’s wispy, white hair in the cloud formation above her. In class, she described his spirit as coming to her “like a wind,” helping her with her math problems. My dad was athletic, so in tribute to him, Eleni learned to play soccer and tennis. She was fast on her feet and adopted my father’s work ethic. 

My mother, on the other hand, was seventy-nine when her husband died. For years, her health had been faltering, first with coronary bypass surgery in her early fifties, then later with various issues causing memory loss and pain. My mother was surprisingly strong, having survived not only these health problems but also the shelling of Athens during World War II, yet somehow, she liked to convince everyone that she was weak, a victim who needed constant care. 

My father had been that primary caregiver, her rock—her lifeline to the world. When he died, my mother was understandably adrift. In order to protect her, my father had declined to tell my mother exactly how sick he was, perhaps believing he had more time to live than he did. But her lack of emotional preparedness and the relative speed of my father’s passing sent my mother into a tailspin. There were days when she stubbornly refused to take her medication and her memory loss worsened. There were times when she became short-tempered with Eleni and with me. 

As the weeks passed, I tried to keep our lives in Brooklyn in balance. My daughter was in first grade now, learning to read, write, and socialize. I was working from home as a freelance writer and editor, which gave me flexibility in terms of time and workflow. But every weekend, Eleni and I would run out to my mother’s house some fifty miles away to check up on her and a family friend who’d agreed to stay temporarily. My mother was sad, lonely, and increasingly confused, and it became clear she would soon need a higher level of care. The turning point came a short while later, when my mother arrived at my apartment for an extended visit. As she bent to tie her shoelaces one day, she slipped and fell, fracturing a vertebra in her back. It was the last day my mother would walk independently. She would soon need a wheelchair. 

Faced with this new set of circumstances and knowing my mother could no longer live independently, I decided to move her to Brooklyn, into a sunny assisted-care facility near my home. I hired loving professional aides to care for my mother and I visited almost daily. But although the logistics of having my mother close by made life easier, I was still wracked with guilt. I knew my mom was suffering. 

For one thing, my mother wanted to go home, and home meant her house on Long Island. Because of her deepening dementia and overwhelming grief, my mother couldn’t understand why she couldn’t live alone and why my father had left her. In an effort to comfort her and settle her nerves, I brought my mother some personal belongings, including a painting she loved of me and Eleni. I also brought my six-year-old daughter to visit her whenever possible. Sometimes Eleni would draw or play contentedly, and sometimes we would all sit together on the couch, watching TV. But on other days, both my mother and Eleni would vie for my attention while an aide was trying to talk to me. At still other times, Eleni found it too hard to visit. It was tough for her to reconcile the grandma she’d once known with the one now lying in a hospital bed. How could this be possible? 

For more than eight years, I was tasked with balancing the needs of both my mother and daughter. Early on, I decided it would be easier for me to see my mother on my own, preferably when Eleni was at school or at a friend’s house. I could sit and hold my mother’s hand or help feed her. I could take her to doctor visits, check on her medication, and talk to her aides without interruption. Eleni would come for shorter visits, after school or on the weekends. 

My days with Eleni at home and in the world were cherished times and often proved to be the antidote, the needed balance, to caring for an aging parent. As a first-time mother—and an older one, at that—I loved every stage of Eleni’s development. As she grew, my daughter played sports. She read and watched movies. She danced. She had friends. She grew taller than me and at times her grandmother barely recognized her, instead remembering her as a smaller child. While my mother drifted in and out of reality and often in and out of hospitals and hospice care, my daughter found joy in real-life activities. She was thriving, and her curiosity about the world buoyed me. 

Eleni also knew intuitively that I was doing my best in a difficult situation. From the time she was six until she was fourteen, Eleni watched as I cared for my mother as she edged closer to dying and bounced back again. She, along with family friends, helped me clear out our Long Island home with its more-than-fifty-years’ worth of possessions, and she was there on the tearful day we sold it to help pay for my mother’s care. Five years after my father’s mesothelioma diagnosis, I was diagnosed with early-stage endometrial cancer and required surgery. Eleni was there to greet me at home with her godparents on the day I returned from the hospital. I was fortunate in that Eleni had always been a considerate child and a fairly easy one to raise. And as she grew older and into her teen years, she empathetically cut me slack when my conflicting duties got the best of me. 

In hindsight, it’s hard to say how I—we, all three of us— got through those challenging years. Sometimes things fell apart, such as when an aide, Eleni, and I took my mother to a doctor’s appointment and got stranded when our wheelchair-accessible transport failed to arrive. Other times, I lost my patience; occasionally, I completely lost my temper with everyone. Eleni had hard days of her own and sometimes seemed inconsolable despite my best efforts to support her. But even in my worst moments, I was lucky enough to have a village to help raise my child and care for my aging mother. 

During those years, I thought often of my father and how he had run marathons later into life, driven by a will of steel. When he died, it felt as if I’d followed in his footsteps. My marathon, however, was of an emotional nature, a very long race that would call for a great deal of energy, determination, and grit in order to reach the finish line. But because I was an older parent in my late forties and fifties during those “sandwich” years, I was able to draw on decades of my own life experience and find wells of strength I never believed I had. 

I was also willing to refocus my priorities on both my mother and daughter, knowing I had one shot to get this right. (As a result, my career and personal life were indefinitely put on hold.) It soon became clear that I couldn’t help my mother get “better,” but I was dedicated to helping her find some measure of comfort and peace. Over time she became less verbal, making it hard to know exactly what she needed and why she held on for so long. But as one of her nurses once told me, “She has too much love. She’s not going anywhere.” As for Eleni, I had waited so long to become a mother that I wanted our experience together to be memorable. I wanted to soak up all the time we had at each stage of her journey, whether it was the big things, like going to Disney World when she was nine, or the small things, like watching Harry Potter movies on repeat. Her joy, happiness, and sound emotional development were at the top of my to-do list each and every day.

In the end, my mother chose the time and place of her passing. On February 15, 2013, on what would have been my father’s eighty-eighth birthday and one week short of her own, my mother died in the Brooklyn hospital where I was born more than fifty years earlier. In another act of perfect symmetry, she was holding the hand of my daughter, a child who was then fourteen and had been named after her, years earlier. 

It was an emotional walk home from the hospital that night. But when we arrived back at our apartment, I pulled out my mother’s wedding ring, a simple, silver band with tiny, twinkling diamonds – a symbol of my parents’ long commitment. I slipped the ring onto my hand thinking I might wear it, but it just didn’t look right on me, so I offered it to Eleni. By some stroke of magic, it fit perfectly on her long, slender ring finger, and I joked that my mother’s ring chose its wearer, just like Harry Potter’s wand chose him. 

Eleni has worn my mother’s ring religiously since that night. It traveled with her and protected her on the subways she took to high school. It swam with her and glistened in the turquoise-dappled waters of the Aegean Sea. It accompanied her to college and to a semester abroad in Italy. It has been given a new life, a new set of adventures in a modern world. My mother’s ring was one that I loved and admired during childhood, and it’s a ring my daughter wears proudly now in memory of her namesake. It’s a symbol of the time that my mother, Eleni, and I all spent together—and a symbol that we all made it through. 


Tick Tock reading at Community Bookstore on Wednesday, 10/6 at 7:30PM EDT featuring Laura Broadwell, Cathy Arnst, Jean Leung, Salma Abdelnour, and editors Vicki Breitbart and Nan Bauer-Maglin.

Filed Under: Books, Community, Park Slope Lit, Park Slope Reading, Reader Excerpt Tagged With: books, parenting, Park Slope

Dispatches from Babyville: Finding Space

September 21, 2021 By Nicole Kear Filed Under: Community, Dispatches From Babyville Tagged With: community, Dispatches from Babyville

My grandmother used to keep her pasta in the dishwasher. Her dishwasher hadn’t worked in decades, and it wasn’t necessary, anyway – she prefers to wash the dishes by hand. But it did take up precious space in her small Bensonhurst apartment. So she decided it would function perfectly as a storage unit for non-perishable goods, like lasagne, tagliatelle, rotini, farfalle, bucatini, penne and orecchiette. 

“Getta me a boxa pasta!” she’d call, and I’d walk over to her defunct dishwasher to select one. 

When you live in a city where one square foot of living space costs hundreds of dollars, you don’t let a broken dishwasher sit empty. You maximize every last inch of usable space, re-purposing and multi-purposing incessantly. Never has that been more true than during the past year and a half, when we were all in and out of shutdowns and quarantines, stuck at home. 

Last August, as our first Covid summer came to a close and my three kids faced a new year of school which we knew would be at least partially remote, I decided we needed to free up space in our apartment. If I made space, we could set up three schoolwork areas, and if I set up three schoolwork areas, we could have an orderly, productive remote school experience.

Let’s set aside the fact that I was delusional in believing any remote school could be productive or orderly. After all, hindsight’s 20/20. 

I started with an innovative brainwave: I’d make my youngest daughter’s bed into a loft, so we could put her dressers underneath it, thus liberating valuable square feet in the shared bedroom. This loft-bed project brought me to Ikea. Me and everyone else in the tri-state area. 

I selected a large quantity of home accessories I did not need, immediately undoing the de-cluttering I had undertaken the week prior. I loaded up on cinnamon rolls and Swedish meatballs and lingonberry soda. Then I headed to the warehouse shelves which were supposed to hold the dresser I’d selected to go in the loft area. When I found the shelves bare, I waited on a serpentine line to ask a women in customer service where I could find them. 

“You can’t,” she said. “We’re sold out.”


“What about in another color? Or at another Ikea?” I asked. 

That’s when she explained that it wasn’t just the Brooklyn Ikea that was sold out but every Ikea in the Eastern Seaboard. 

“The whole Eastern Seaboard?” I repeated. It was a strange expression to use at Ikea’s customer service desk. 

“Yep,” she replied. “Everybody’s fixing up their houses before school starts.”

Looks like I was not alone in my quest to make everything that was wrong in the world right with some light redecorating. 

The loft-bed was only the first of my home improvement projects. Freeing up those precious few square feet whetted my appetite for “finding” more space. This is a misleading term. It’s not as if extra space was hiding somewhere, like there was a trick wall that, when pushed on at the exact right spot, revealed a secret room. Still, I believed that if I planned thoughtfully enough, arranged furniture carefully enough, I’d make the little space we had go much farther. 

The challenge — a challenge shared by everyone — was that my apartment, which used to be just a home, now had to serve so many other functions. It was an elementary school, and also a middle school and a high school, too. It was an office for my husband and I, and a conference room. It was a gym. A music studio where my 14-year-old took piano lessons. A dance studio where my 9-year-old took ballet. An art studio where my 16-year-old learned how to use pastels and acrylics. It was an exam room for practice SATs. A vocal rehearsal space for high school audition tapes. It was a therapy office. 

No home can serve that many functions, and definitely not one that covers less than 1300 square feet. 

Still, I tried, the way we all did. What choice did we have? 

I maximized the use of our tiny balcony which Pre-Covid had never been used, because it overlooks Fourth Avenue and is loud, polluted and generally grimy. Now, the balcony functioned as a gym, housing the budget stationary bike my husband bought in the early days of Covid, when even bike riding seemed too dangerous. By happenstance one day, my 9-year-old discovered zoom school was much more tolerable when she did it while pedaling. Then the balcony because a gym/ classroom. Multi-purposing at its finest. 

The bathroom became an animal sanctuary, with two hamster cages stashed in the bathtub. 

“I need to take a bath,” my daughter whined one night. 

“Forget it,” I told her. “That’s the hamsters’ real estate.”

Another night, my teenage daughter complained there was no room quiet enough to record the original song she’d written on guitar. 

“Go play in my closet,” I told her, as if it was obvious. “The clothing will be a good buffer.”

And she did. Thus began the “Closet Concert” series.

Coordinating remote school was more difficult. When not riding the bike on the balcony, my little one preferred to do zoom school from the living room, which was where my older daughter liked to work too, So much for the special work stations I’d taken pains to establish in August. Most mornings, they’d get set up in the living room, which is also the kitchen, which is also my office, and so, while working, I’d be treated to a lecture on mitosis while simultaneously learning about the establishment of New Amsterdam while listening to my husband grind coffee. 

“Dad, stop!” the girls shouted in stereo. “We’re at SCHOOL!” 

“Where am I supposed to grind coffee?” he asked. 

“The balcony!” I replied, exasperated. “That’s where all grinding, blending and hair drying happens during school hours. When it’s not being used as a gym.” 

One night in late autumn, I was sitting on the couch surveying my living room, which had become impassable. The keyboard and chair blocked egress to the balcony. The exercise bike, dragged inside to avoid rain, blocked egress to the bathroom. You couldn’t sit at the dining room table because there wasn’t space enough to pull the chairs out, what with the desk I’d wedged in there for my husband and the lamp. 

“I wish we could put furniture on the ceiling,” I said wistfully to David. “Is that — are we sure that’s impossible?” 

“You are getting carried away,” he said. It’s not the first time he’s said this to me.

“The problem is there’s not enough space in this house!” I exclaimed. 

“The problem is a deadly pandemic is ravaging our world,” he said. 

He was, of course, right. 

There was nothing I could do about the complex, maddening, terrifying problem of Covid, so I focused with a deranged zeal on a problem that could be fixed. Except that solving one did not solve the other.

“No matter how inventive I was with my storage, or how many functions I could eek out of one toilet bowl (desk chair! salon chair! toilet!), it didn’t change the despair I felt every day over what my kids were missing, and I was missing, which was nothing compared to what so many had lost, and continued to lose. “

Then, in November, just after I’d maximized every nook and cranny of the apartment, I decided to add something entirely different to the house. The puppy who is now a member of our family is small but takes up plenty of square footage, racing around our small home at a breakneck pace, strewing his toys and chewys everywhere, dragging garbage across the floor, wreaking havoc. His crate and beds and gates and food bowls have made me admit defeat in the battle against clutter. Our house is absolutely overbrimming with stuff. But it is also overbrimming with delight. We can’t look at the pup without cracking a smile, or dissolving into coos, or squealing with laughter. He makes the house messy, and immeasurably happy. 

I couldn’t find any more space within the confines of the apartment, but I found plenty of breathing room in the expansive joy the puppy brought with him. 

Filed Under: Community, Dispatches From Babyville Tagged With: community, Dispatches from Babyville

  • Go to page 1
  • Go to page 2
  • Go to page 3
  • Interim pages omitted …
  • Go to page 5
  • Go to Next Page »

Primary Sidebar

The Spring 2025 Issue is now available

The Reader Community

READER CONTRIBUTORS

Copyright © 2025 · Park Slope Reader